Corrupted Visions Presents : Money, Beneficials, Rap & Life
 

In life we all fall down and someones there to help us up
But in rap u gotta play with the hand u were dealt it sucks
Reppin with old school chucks, I felt fresh with health deluxe
We try to help the nuts, yes even when the wealth's abrupt
Erything in the world isn't money, ppl should learn life isnt funny
Oh who the fuck am I kiddin I need loot for the sky to be sunny
The green, makes earth evolve through scenes & involve new teams
Revolving beams, like doors that open screams for hopes and dreams

Why is it that no one here knows the truth
If they did they don't show in it the booth
Like how the dead don't show the living their after life
I guess there is none but theres a supreme master right?
Fuck religion and fuck decision!, free will is death for livin
Smug precision luck & wisdom, I see still the rest is givin
Thats just the way we live and it's time for a name change
But that's impossible unless EVRYONE is on the same page
The presidentail spot is nothin but control and a paycheck
The ability to scare us & other countries they make threats
Make debts, there goes OUR paychecks! all to state taxes
They rape masses, blindfold us all so they can evade taxes
Whats that bullshit?!, they think we all follish, but its not that
We a thread spooless in a race to be coolest, lets drop acts
Maybe things would be different if our God was brought back
Then different things then money would actually be sought at
Certain people live thier life for the calling of Christ
Other's go crazy and slash themselves witta knife
The spectrum burns so bright, when inflicted with light
Theres to ends of it tonight, now I'm evicited from the Mic

In life we all fall down and someones there to help us up
But in rap u gotta play with the hand u were dealt it sucks
Reppin with old school chucks, I felt fresh with health deluxe
We try to help the nuts, yes even when the wealth's abrupt
Erything in the world isn't money, ppl should learn life isnt funny
Oh would the fuck am I kiddin I need loot for the sky to be sunny
The green, makes earth evolve through scenes & involve new teams
Revolving beams, like doors that open screams for hopes and dreams

uppppn.

--[Flow]---
Your flow was what hit me first it was off-da-hook...think you really executed some dope interals here..dope structure, all the bars were basically the same length...some brutal bars in this...

--[Vocab]--
You showed some good vocab in several places here, but it lacked consistancy, aim to achieve this...some lines were dope and other lines came across as a little simplistic, work on it..but you showed some real potential here...

"Thats just the way we live and it's time for a name change
But that's impossible unless EVRYONE is on the same page
The presidentail spot is nothin but control and a paycheck" - whoa! It sums up these 2 points (flow and vocab).

--[Concept]--
You pulled the topic off well, even though it is fast becoming a played out topic as rap goes through this "revolution" as some might call it, but you put a nice personal perspective to it and it came across well...

--[Overall]--
Thought the flow was the best aspect of this piece..vocab as i said was a little inconsitant and the concept has been played but you pulled it off generally pretty well...3/5..work on what i mentioned..but dope piece.

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not done one of these breakdowns in about 6 months..lol.

i agree this was pretty good, i wasnt expecting it... it was a bit of a played concept, but still you got it across... mainly with the flow, it made it easy to read... some decent internals, but it wasnt very consistant, try and keep things at the same level.... but not bad... decent

..this was very nice..one of your best open mics..I like the concept..it is bit played out but you carried it very well..your flow was dope through out the whole piece..keep up the good work..~click on my sig~~~

Yeah i agree this was a real good piece here man.....made a good read i thought....your structure in this was good....you had some good flow in this, it stayed on pretty well through out the whole piece....you had some nice multies in this, liked that....content was pretty good as well...overall a nice piece...keep at it.

uppp........

uplllllllllllllllllll

this was good man...i just saw it and ya structure really Surpised Me...i think it has changed alot...i thought ya Flow in this was good and i think thats one of ur strong Points....your vocb is alright and i think that u could use a litle work on it...Like C man said u got good multis in there which i thought fitted this piece well....wordplay was also alright which doesnt need as much work on...man this was a reall nice keep emm droping man it was a good read.....PeacE.....