[Wk1]Mentill vs Big EZ
Verses Due: Tuesday February 3rd, 2004
Voting Ends: Saturday February 9th, 2004 Topic: Ease The Pain |
chek..!
|
Heh ... Dope topic ... Im here
|
None shall presume to fly, under pain of death. --Addison. My millitry made mind...........Makes me insane Wish i cud wash it 'way with rain.......Ease my pain Months spent away...........From my imedeate Family Un-happily acting my emotions......Hiding my Insanity Plains of raw flesh...........How many here were hurt Teeth marks from ethnic war....Heads crushed on curbs Many styles of Hardship....Some Love...Some Physical My Pain has recently De-Creased......Is this a Myricle? I turn my cheek at Horrid Pictures.....Mentors of Torture My heart torn out from my chest....Blasted in a Mortar The many ways how we feel pain.....Exampled in my life I wonder how we all differ...Would they sample my strife I gather feelings of past results....Scars on my anatomy But life without experiences..........Must be a Catastrphy I Fantasticly anounce a State........A loss of happy love Why am i punished for a crime....That i'm Innocent of I ponder theories of staying safe.....Im sick of being hurt Why do my emotion get inverted....Its Happyness i assert Two rongs dont make a right...Its my second time of torment Im entitled to out emotions...Empty my heart of its contents If its a Loved one you have lost..Or a Injury you have gained It takes more than modern medicine..To ease todays pain Interpose, on pain of my displeasure. --Dryden. |
Eh due date is tomorrow .. But I'll key sumthin' up right now .. Ease The Pain .. Hmm
Dead flat, layed out, my blood covers the floor Life liquid runnin' out, I don't want this no more Im sore, pain stricken, to much pride for me 2 cry I once thought I had too much life for me 2 die Im pleadin' "why?" but nobody can hear me Yet Im surrounded by people, they're juss staring Uncaring, sad, happy, each showin' their own emotions Was engulfed in silence, till the big one had spoken My flesh open, Im hopin' the end is near Cuz Im here, wishin' I could befriend a tear Trapped behind fear and anxiety, it's strange Shit doesn't ever really change, why did it have to rain? Covered in pain, I can hear heaven's angel's callin' I was fallin', now it seems that the fall started stallin' The face of death is appalin', that's why I hate autumn I went from hoppin, to rottin' on rock a bottom "We got 'em!" yelled the large man .. as he screamed his companions name So much for this deer's dear last stand Now I wish they'd hurry up and ease the pain |
Vote ! ! !
|
Both pieces were well written.. But i got to go with EZ on this one.. Just felt his verse flowed a little better & his content was a little more entertaining.. Mentill yours was pretty nice too, but i felt EZ out did you by a little.
Vote EZ |
Both had good verses. but Bigg E Z had a very well put out verse. It had good imagry emotion and complex detail. Mentill you had a good verse also but I felt some lines seemed rushed...but over all close battle.
Vote Bigg |
good battle.......verses could have been longer.....mentill......why did you key?......tha breakdown:
Big E.Z. rhyme scheme- 7, story- 8, flow- 7, total- 22 nyce drop............really felt tha emotion (extremely deep), flow was ok...........could have been longer to show better imagery Mentill- rhyme scheme- 7.5, story-7, flow-7.5, total-21.5 this was a close battle, why didnt you take more time mentill...............you could've ripped it, i really lyked tha first half of your verse..........but afta that it just fell off, you could have elaborated and made it longer my vote goes to Big E.Z...........no hard feelins, may tha best man win, peace, 1 ohh yeah, go vote on my battle |
Pretty Nice Battle On Both Ends. Both Came With Decent Concepts And Had Nice Imagery. Bigg's Verse Just Seemed To Get Me Wanting To Read On That Little Bit More, It All Flowed Together Well, Not Brilliant, But Good None The Less. MeNTiLL Came Nice, Just Lacked A Bit In The Enjoyment Factor.
Good Battle Fella's. Vote - Bigg |
Thanx for all of u
|
i thought both pieces approached the topic well, and had great content. both had a good flow and rhyme scheme, but i felt that EZ's piece had a little more emotion and better content in it. found it a bit more interesting. thou i liked mentill's rhyme scheme better my vote goes to EZ.
~Tera~ DONT HATE |
Thanx
|
Bigg wins
|
All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:31 PM. |