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[Wk1]Tsar Casm vs Key Low
Verses Due: Tuesday February 3rd, 2004
Voting Ends: Saturday February 9th, 2004 Topic: Tight Lipped |
checkin inners....
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g'luck, peace, 1
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The shadow in your way, was a feeling to be touched,
She didn't talk much, her and her friends were a little bunch, The ones considered delinquents, not known by many, The below par group, to which no one cared to be friendly, But she was tight lipped, just dying to open up, Lived a great slump, and moved through it with a great hump, But her actions showed a great attraction to someone out of their ring, Her attention span was passing him a glance, with a mere blink, The friends had all noticed, but tried not to ackowledge it, Still she played her polished tricks, to mess with these soon to be college kids, She knew it wouldn't happen, she had no chance to be accepted, possibilities could be endless, could she work her way in this societys deathpit, Her friends dared to be different, she tried to be the same, See the difference was that she's naturally different, and they were faking this game, So on she realized that this would most likely never happen, But then one day, her luck took to another action, He talked to her, she wondered why had this magnificent event occured, She had liked him he had heard, and he wanted to have a word, They walked to his house, went to his room and she lurked, Peeking at his stuff, seeing whether or not she should merk, Nothing out of the ordinary, she decided not to leave, While he put on his cover, she still had such trouble to believe, That this event so randomly took place, she had a lost expression on her face, But it was for the better, cause her tight lips began to open, His swift moves made her yell, but she was soon able to start copin', Hopin' it would soon end, though loving the sentimental divinty, She had opened her tight lips, meaning she'd just lost her virginity... |
Intro: Have you ever seen something incredibly horrific happen, in person? If so, who did you tell…if anyone? Sometimes the continuance of life could depend on unspoken words…most other times it doesn’t matter. Next time you see something you shouldn’t have…I’d suggest keeping your mouth shut to avoid terrible consequences. It’s your decision…make it wisely.
Spoken: His name was Jimmie…a bright first grader who despised his Mother and Father/ Never taught to Covet tha Law First…his dad…. Corrupted and Bothered/ No guidance…except the Love of tha FATHER…his tears…a Bucket of Water/ His dad…an alcoholic who abused his wife…eventually Abducted his Daughter/ Jimmie hated tha way his mom didn’t help…he became Destructive and Slaughtered/ His mom’s fear…was like Jimmie’s knees…they Buckled…tha Falls Hurts/ What was it All Worth? When he complained…he got Stuck in tha Jaw…Worse/ Sumtimes Lil J wanted to quit…Life, especially after what Came Next/ In slow motion, Jimmie saw tha Hate Infest and his fathers Rage Express/… Tha demon inside and his Corroded Soul, murder…with Satan’s Respect/ His eyes…Flames Infest, “Father Almighty”…he Changed tha Text/ His Veins are Pressed, turns to Jimmy’s sister, and Blames tha Stress/ Suddenly, he Claims her Breath, a swift blow …Rearrange her Nest/ ”Tha Shame…Regrets, tha alki made me Penetrate her Flesh (Legs)/ And Make her Flex…saturate tha carpet...and Make a Mess”/ “No…Dad”, he Breaks her Neck…”my daughter cant Be Pregnant/… With my baby…I’m so sorry hunny and I Regret It/ Let’s try to Forget It”…he slowly hands her a Necklace…a Present/ What happens next…I can Not Believe…Jimmy’s mom Nods and Agrees/ “It’s a Hypocrisy…my mom…shut her mouth…and Forgot with Ease/ Her speech under Lock and Key…even worse…Cops Believed/ How can insanity…Unlock sum Peace, but I gotta Stop this Thief/ I sprinted to tha police station…opened my mouth…and Dropped my Teeth/ Unspoken: Hear no evil, see no evil, and speak no evil…tha phrase he Should’ve Followed/ All tha pain and Blood that Followed, All that Blood he Swallowed/ A Thud that Hallowed…tha inside of his skull…Right Quick/ Tha Knife Ripped…his face, his stomach…and his Sliced Wrists/ Titled suicide…tha Precise Miss…his fathers escape…was tha Nights Gift/ A young child…Lifeless, because he didn’t look away and stay Tight Lipped/ peace |
Dope drop..people vote!
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damn..this was nice..
Sarcasm's verse~yeah..it was okay..but truthfully..it was kind of boring..I wasn't feelin it at all..some good lines..but..I just wasnt feelin it..:(..sorry Key-Low's verse~I liked yours..it held my attention..I liked it..although your structure could have been a lil better,I still enjoyed the way you put your words together..terrible ending..and I dont mean rap wise,I mean story wise..it was sad..but..it still entertained me..so..my vote goes to Key-Low.. |
lyft it for more votes, peace, 1
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Hmm... Close battle here, My vote is going to Sarcasm, because both verses were pretty much on the same level as each other, but Sarcasm's different approach is what got me, Key Lo's verse was good, but a very predictable ending, and That was the story approach I expected from both verses. Sarcasm's twist came at a bit more of a surprise, though the ending seemed a little bit cheesy to me, but it was still enough to give him my vote.
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upity uptiy up and away!
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damn.........lyft it for votes, peace, 1
1-1 |
you sleepin bastadz...........
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Two good drops here.
Enjoyed many elements from both. Essentially this was a tie in my eyes until the twist in Tsar's verse. That puched it over the edge for me giving him my vote. |
I liked both peices.. Tsar's peice had a really nice twist
in it.. but i didn't like the rhymes that flowed to your piece. Maybe its me.. just seemed a little basic Key low came creative, but not as creative as Tsar. His flow was on point and the story was sumwhat intriguing v/ Key Low in a close one |
lol....nyce lookin with tha votes fellaz, but now tha count is 2-2.......lyft it, peace, 1
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