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Secluded
Only A Certian Child Has Obscene Direction Born With Out A Fathers Help Or Protection We Never Met I Grew Up With No Man Influence To Easily Make The Unknowlagable Into Sence I Was Told He Walked The Stairs To Heavon ..I Prayed For Answers.. No Replies To Questions Nor A Simple Beckon So Meaningful A Sons Memeries Of His Dad Tears Fall Cause Of Bliss I Never Got To Have I Know It Sounds Selfish But I'm Crying Inside For Theres Only A Picture Of My Blood At My Side Although My Mom Took Care Of The Depressing Hole ..In My Heart.. Some Feelings Of Emotions Where Out Of Her Control I Feel As If I Was Beaton By A Unknown Ghost A Christian Who Hates God For He Stole All Hope When He Took My Father Breath So Easily Away Picked A Tombstone That I Never Seen For His Grave Mom Wouldn't Let Me Visite I Missed Some Factors I Realised The Past Was Hard To see So It didn't Matter Desires Burn From Emotional Flames I'd Run But I'm Choking I See A son In A Fathers Arms Deaths Always Prevoking Stare At My Only Picture Of My Father For Ambition ..I Was Named After You.. So To Make Your Name legendary Is My Life Mission ..I Turned Sixteen.. Off To Get My License An I Needed My Birth Certificate Found A Box Of Letters To My Past Knowledgable Benifit ..Smiled In Answers.. Hid Hate For My Moms Betrayel Of My Dads Demies I Was Secluded Sixteen Years Of Looking In your Eyes |
This was pretty nice. I can kind of relate. I was named after my father and never knew him either. The only difference is he's stil alive. Anyway, nice emotion in this piece.
Quote:
^That is nice Quote:
^This has aplied ti me so many times. Its just ill. I liked the piece. Keep up the good work. Please drop feedback here: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=111511 |
shit man u get iller every drop aye...thi was hella good
Most of the lines were quotables and i can also relate to this peice as i have had the same problems dope work we have to do another collab soon.............peice |
Thanks a lot for the positive feed...
Emotion i'm down for that collabo...get at me sometime with a topic |
this was good, i really liked this piece man. It was awsome... lots of emotion, actually tellin somethin, and you had good vocab and flow. Great piece man. If you could hit me up with some feedback for my 2 drops that'd be greatly appreciatd.
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=111585 http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=111615 |
damn this was ill...
very emotional...everything was on point wordplay etc... heartfelt... ill shit...keep spittin... check my battle... |
will do that tomorrow for you's...uppen
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nice drop rule, you've elevated alot since the last time i've read your stuff. Vocab is really good, so was structure and flow, felt the emotion that you put into this, we can all relate to it in someway. Nice drop dawg kept me interested through out the whole thing, can't wait to see more from ya. keep droppin
peace check out my latest please, there in my siggy |
will do...up
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Hmm...I agree you do get iller with every drop...(although I still don't know why your name is rule and Jay is in your avy?)..anyway..this was a dope drop..you always come up with a dope concept(which as you know is a major plus..cayse half of the cats here are Gangstas~~~~LOL~~)..you had a great flow going on..and as always your vocab and wordplay was right on the money...good kob...peace...
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I'm feeling this cuz, nice piece. Vocabulary was nice, this was well written. Made me want to hear more, creative shit cuz. Keep uppin.
Check my Open Mic 'Middle Child'.. 1 |
“Was Told He Walked The Stairs To Heavon
..I Prayed For Answers.. No Replies To Questions Nor A Simple Beckon” Very deep line, to me. Very nice emotional piece overall. Kept flow, and you kept strength threw out this Piece. This remind so of situation of my father when He was around when I was a child. Good job on this piece Stay dropping niceness |
Thanks a lot for the replies...uppen
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