as i sit and contemplate, what you think?
 

white, black, or red,
American, Canadian, or Mexican
Freedom vs prusacution,
it doesnt matter the life we lead
it's just a percure to the life we bleed
I live and die for my culture
Scraps getting picked over like vultures
diss getting thrown back and forth
Jay-Z, Nas XXL and the source
now they kllin each other of course
I was born in to a country home
through that time and next, I've grown
I'm seen culture give birth
Then I seen it fester into something worst
races one and lost in a signal night
cause we black and white we have to fight
What? this shit ain't right,
On judgement day, what will god say
taken something so beautiful and made it decay
we don't get to pick and choice we obey
Okay....I'm reload, fuck another one dies today

a bit messy..
need to work on the delivery of your thoughts and turn an ordinary verse like this to something which is more polished and interesting for the reader
cos this piece had a poor rhyme structure basic rhyming and seemed to have contant of little relevance
concentrate on your verse and what youre trying to say..
make it more concise
keep at it though

reply to mine if u can
cheers

thanks I feel ya it's hard to write form style cause that not how i rap,...I'm goin to have to got to audio cause i pause to much in my flow.