Those contrasting eyes
 

My mind is racing, pacing. If love built a house I'm on the bottom floor
It's hard to explain the situation even with similes and metaphors...
When you're around I feel the need to act nonchalant or silly
But the moment you're leave, these feelings erupt from within me
I see you laugh with your friends and, I try and play it cool even more
Having fun without my attention when I'm desolate without yours
When it's time to take the wheel you always take the backseat
Afraid of my physical impurities, before we speak, I admit defeat
You have contrasting eyes, I see them and lover's thoughts begin
So hot it melts my heart, yet takes my breath like cold gusts of wind
Every time you show affection to me, my mind revels in power
Feeling victory in sections, I ignore you to feed my ego for hours
Alone I think of how I can do better, take myself to the limit
I don't hate love though it may seem, just the games I play when I'm in it...
I flirt with others trying to get validation of love through your jealousy
But do you like me or my attention? Only mixed signals you're sending me
I daydream of kissing, touching and also romancing you
How can I be a bitter lover when I've rejected the chance to
Neither of us are close to perfect. I want but I don't need you
but you seem like perfection to me the way I know I'll never reach you
I need a sign from you even though I'm in no position for demands
I'll know when you look at me with "those contrasting eyes" again




Anyone wanna give me some insight or feedback on my poem? It would be appreciated.

Nice shit. I liked the topic. Real good flow and wordplay. Everything was pretty tite bout it

It's hard to explain the situation even with similes and metaphors...

Lots o peeps use that line, but poetry to me dont really matter waht u say as long as you expressin yaself. Nice Stuff.

~Holla if ya hear me

you grabbed my attention with the first line. you gave this piece a strong opener, with a great flow, awsome vocab, and good structure.it read smoothly and sounds good outloud. i like the way you approached the topic and molded it. kept it interesting and alive by all the little turns of direction in it. your imagery was great, had good detail and kept it unique. the ending was also unique, that way you put it and all. showed good emotion and was overall a strong piece.

~Tera~
DONT HATE