Me!!
 

Flinpin Sripts,grillin MC's who fake like jordens tits,
Puttin' a pound to da gut of extremist,
challengers wid no penskillz or penis,
Set my lyrical bondary far and knock a won-a-b rapper for six,
and smoke em leavin tar in there lungs,
im da illest MC wid rhymes twistin tungs,
Raw tallent blosseming wid every silable produced,
Lyrical MC freasher than freashly squeezed orange jucie,
Records lables comitin suiside for my signiture,
coz wid rhymes stunnig MC's and English literture,
Painting a verble picture,wid verbs iller,
than a needle junkie piller,
im da real deal leaving MC's in tamtrums,
if someone kid-naped me every1 would wona pay ransom,
yeah i maybe white, but still kill u on da mic,
Fuck your race wen i burn you verble weneva i like,
I turn MC' into ashes,
leaving them wid scar's, burns and gashes,
Lyrical Host extreme mic cred,
Snap MC's penskills and pencil lead,
battlin me will turn you alcoholic,coz MC's beatin lyrical mc is very ironic,
so da consiquence of u battlin me is hittin da gin and tonic,
Smash MC's leavin niggas sounding amaeture,
Stop them breathing and leave dem wid no manager,
but to me talk is cheep,so ima spit on da mic un compete,
and leave MC's in shit knee deep,
Fillin bitches wid bulltes in dis lyrical rampage,
beef wid me and i will pull out my lyrical 12 gage,
im straight of da block taking hip-hop to fifth gear,
kickin more freestyles den days in a year,
no MC is a contest,coz my rhymes consist of vouls and punchlines..
....witch set peeps to rest,
The word is lyrical will concer Hip-Hop and tie it wid a rope,
Journalist printing my lines and expressing that im DOPE!!!

Please hit me wid some feed back peeps....dis is one of my first open mics...aaiigghhtttt :)

Not bad, could of used better vocabulary. And people in America probably wont know who Jordan is so they might of stopped reading after the first line.

cheers bro....but ever1 no's who jordan is....keep da feedback coming1111aiiigghhtttt

please hit dis wid some feed back...i need advise coz dis is 1 of me first.....aaaiiggghhttt!!!!.......:)

please hit me wid some fed back ppl......i need feed back...aaaiigghttt!!!

Please hit dis wid some feed back...aaaiiggghhtttt!!!!!!
PZ!

you need to work on your flow abit more but it was aiight for one of your firsts...rest was aiight though
keep it up

please drop feedback on this...aaaaiiggghhtttt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!

NOTHIN' BIG. ALOT OF MISSPELLING AND SOMEWHAT WEAK PUNCHLINES. SO REWORK SOME OF YOUR WORDING AND COME TIGHTER ON YOUR RHYMES. KEEP WRITING. 3/10 FOR EFFORT.

...SUPERVILLAIN

punchlines?????^^^^^ its a open mic u dick head.............

it was a descent piece man...had some good word structure some good word play...good vocabulary..it was nicely written....if u keep it up u should be hott man...

yo feedback plz

nice thread. its hot. keep it up. im lookin forward to some of your new shit.