my first, constructive criticism plz??
 

just sittin in english wishin i could win this/
without reliable wack practice/
i need to learn this mathmatics/
relax its just a test and i only request/
that you take the gun away from your head/
so you can try to walk a stray from your dread/
i cant stop thinking about equalibrium/
you cant stop freaking at that stupid **** you bum/
next time i meet you, i hope i dont see you geeked too/
so sit back and rewind/
this is my first and wont be re-rhymed

that was tight.
keep that shit up and youll become ill as hell.
try to have creativity in your punches.
if ya dont know what i mean go and check out my shit on open mic.
peace

thanks meh i wrote it in english haha(wack ass class) teacher so messed up

i feel you.
fuckin teachers are just fuckin takin up time check some of my shit on open mic

anyone else???

that shit was good
but you could improve on the punches but all around it was good

thanks meh, i'm still workin on punches

thanks i'm mostly puttin freestyles in the cypher(disses n weapons)
although i did write this one straight off the top of my head

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