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-   -   The Tragic (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=121198)

JONESYUK 04-28-04 12:24 PM

The Tragic
 


Speaking
My life was changed on this sad day, open your ears and listen to what i have to say


Early hours in September, was the start of the downfall
I was a sleep in bed, when I had a sudden phonecall
It was my homies mum on the end, upset and cryin
Saying my boy was in hospital, and slowly dieing
He had a very bad car crash, after a night on the beer
Leaving me, the rest of his friends and family all in fear
I dropped my phone, I couldn’t believe what had happened
My homeboy was placed the victim of a horrific car accident
What upset me most, was that I thought I broken a sin
Because my boy called me early, but I said ‘im staying in’
I was shattered for weeks, as I was unable to see him
Only hearing updates, making sure that he was still breathing
There were many moments when his life was critical
I was hearing news, saying his health was looking really dull
Every night, didn’t sleep, all this happening week after week
Then the truth was out, police told his family at his bed
That he was the passenger in the car, so someone left him for dead
Still not able to see him, I was really getting mad
Especially after hearing the truth from my boyz dad
All this shit was getting bad, and it was leaving his family sad

Chorus
Life is short, consequences do happen
Less than a thought, this got me rapping
Life is short, consequences do happen
Less than a thought, this got me rapping


I will never forget the day, week before Christmas, 18th December
Man its all up in my head, I can still remember
The phone started ringing I heard my boys on the other line
I heard his voice for the first time, since the crash in September
He said ‘you know who this is’, ‘Jones im getting better’
I said ‘course I know who it is’ ‘how could I ever forget ya’
I actually felt happy, this feeling was a massive relief
Still not able to see him, but real beliefs of hearing him speak
I got to see him the very next week..boxing day night
Seeing him with wires, tubes and machines gave me a fright
But I stood close to him, spoke to him and held his hand tight
Kept telling my boy, that everything was going to be all right

Chorus
Life is short, consequences do happen
Less than a thought, this got me rapping
Life is short, consequences do happen
Less than a thought, this got me rapping


The following week… my boy was at home resting
Docs still keeping eyes on him by checking and testing
But he was ok, he was gonna get through it
Secretly for the start, I already knew this
More weeks went past, and my boy was improving and awful alot
He couldn’t wait to get out, see the world again for a normal spot
Finally he could leave his house and we checked every place out
Everyone had missed him, wherever he went he always got a shout
Now hes nearly fully recovered, but I will always remember
That early hour call, on the 21st of that tragic September

Chorus
Life is short, consequences do happen
Less than a thought, this got me rapping
Life is short, consequences do happen
Less than a thought, this got me rapping


JONESYUK 04-28-04 12:28 PM

ill get links now

Identity2k 04-28-04 12:41 PM

yo this shit was ill but had a choppy flow. Some of the rhymes in the beginning were weak but it got better. The hook was a little simple also but other than that the shit was tite

holla back at mine
I AM THE AMERICAN DREAM
BLOOD, SWEAT, and TEARS

JONESYUK 04-28-04 03:13 PM

feedback plz

mC.Cm 04-28-04 03:14 PM

1 Word GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG UNIT!!!!!!!
:shoot: :cussing:
WESTSIDE!!

JONESYUK 04-28-04 04:30 PM

^^^ok can i get some feedback plz

PsyKOpath 04-28-04 04:44 PM

[GOOD STUFF]

The subject was deep, and probably hard to write about. I enjoy reading something other than 'I'm the best rapper', so this was nice.

The hook was pretty tight..simplistic, yet put the message across.

[BAD STUFF]

The flow was choppy almost though the whole thing.
It would have been better if you had used some multis.
It didn't really put a great picture in my head. But only practise can help that.

Overall..it was an aiight drop..keep it up, homie.

And if you have the time please leave feed on this drop:

http://community.rapbattles.com/showthread.php?t=121135

Peace


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