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.::Re$tricted Vs. Limited Edition::.(Topical)
Topical Battle: Re$tricted Vs. Limited Edition Topic: Hopes and Dreams 20-30 Lines No D/R, Hate Crew Votez Verses Due By Thursday .::Checkity Check::. Good Luck LE! ~R~ |
A'ight dawg checkin' in good luck to you, too dawg.
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Aight Check It..Verses Due Today...
I'ma Post Mine Up When I Get Home From School. MY LAST DAY OF SCHOOL FOR MY JUNIOR YEAR!! ~R~ |
A'ight I thought you woulda posted by now...but w/e dawg, postin' mine right now.
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LoL Nah Kid..I Was Mad Busy Today..My Girl Came Home Wit Me After School....
Mine Will Be Up Before The Due Date..Don't Get Sassy Kid.. ~R~ |
Hopes and Dreams
Yo...check it... My life is in distraught shambles...shit tearin' at broken seams Never realized it till now...I will never fulfill my hopes and dreams Becoming a writer...my first book faces multiple rejection My destiny to fail...too many screw-ups witout correction Hope to have a wife...dream to someday be called 'Dad' But every fucked-up thing, a cut...but it feels like a stab Tried to find new dreams...tried drugs and even religion Hopin' suicide won't claim me...and that my dreams will be fulfillin' Hoping...dreamin for the right girl...who would actually passionotaly kiss Dream to see the world...I hope to God that there is more to life than this I dream...that I could win and carry on after every battle life gave But there's a war against my hopes....that will carry straight to the grave Wake up...get the mail...wait...hope...my book will come out this summer Small hopes and dreams fulfilled...new quad, snowboard, maybe a hummer The right girl...walkin' down the highway...she needs a lift... We start talkin'...her face is heavenly...must be a gift Years pass...dreamns take flight...hope is renewed Kids...I am retired...seein' the world...found my solitude Damn...wake up from my sleep...I am still livin' undergraded Don't believe a werd poetry says... ...cause dreams are overrated... |
.::My Topic Spit::.
.::Topic: Hopes and Dreams::. As I Sit In A Distraught World Of Endless Envy and Hate.. I Take Into Perspective Everything Giving To Me As Of Late.. I Finally Realize With This Maturity I've Gotten With Age.. That There Are Better Solutions To Life Than Pain and Rage.. Like Writting With Ink On Page The Emotions In My Heart.. So That Others Can Relate To My Songs and Look To Embark.. It's Me That Gives The Died Out Flame of Shame A New Spark.. R Talks The Truth and Justifies The New Era A Fresh Start.. Cause The Hopes Of These Deliquint Juvi's Who Fuck Up Early.. Ending Up An OutKast and Made Fun Of Cause Their Hairs Curly.. But Its Genetics That Have Been Evolutionized In Life Spans.. Cause The Whites Who Hate Blacks Revolt and Become Life Fans.. Luther King Jr's Dreams and Hopes Are Being Accomplished Now.. It Took His Death and Many Others To Draw A Big Enough Crowd.. To Implie and Direct Enough Force To The Government Of Course.. Who Just Throws Out These Racist Cases Like A 30 Year Old Hourse.. The Followers Of This Subject Are The Ones Keeping The Struggle.. This Life-Long Struggle Has Many In Buckles Like Nails In Knuckles.. But Fuck Em, Cause This Hate Will Be Erased Fully Until We Unite.. Crack Whips Inspite, and Someday The Blacks Will Have Revenge On Whites.. Unless Intergalactic Enemies Who We Have Pissed Off Come For War.. A Three Way Battle Between Them, Blacks, and Whites..Seen It Before.. Malcom X Who Has Lead The Armies Of Justice Sparked This Mind.. With The Keen Kind Of Relapsed Signs That Will Calapse Spines.. You See Even Though I'm White On The Outside I'm Black Within.. My Brain Built Around Black History..I've Blessed Those Sins.. Of My Ignorant Ancestors Who Knew No Better Then To Be Cruel.. Cause This All Got Started With That Fucking King Who Took Rule.. The Blacks Dethrowned His Ass and Isolated Their Own Destined Path.. Cause With All These Dreams and Hopes The Fire Has Been Kept Within Wrath.. ~R~ |
.::Nice Drops Here, Another Syck Topical::. Upping For These Votes Peeps ~R~ |
Quote:
Haha, I wasn' gettin' sassy or no shit like that...I think a girlfriend is way more important than this shit fo sho. Besides, I wouldn' have cared if you didn't spit today anyway...there is always somethin' more important than this shit. Oh congrats on best vet of April too dawg...dope as topical verse too...this was my first topical battle. |
Ok...
I have to Give this to ~R~ b/c he had Better Vocab,Flow and Overall Just a Deeper Insight on the Topic. LE=5.432/10 ~R~=8.233/10 |
Ayio Uppin Dis Topical.. ~R~ |
hott verses from both:
L.E: you had a good drop for this being your fist topical...came together real well..pretty consistent decent wordplay and structure...imagery wasnt too good but overall good topical 5/10 re$tricted: you had a better verse and had alot of good imagery and wordplay...structure was str8 and it flowed right off the tongue lol...consistent all the way through good drop 7/10 vote: re$tricted i think he satyed on topic better than L.E did and he has more experience in topical battles so he had an advantage here and won this topical good pieces from both ~!1!~ |
L.E.-Came nice..Imaginary...Yea was aight..Did good
But You came pretty tight with the vocabular and the Balance.. Keep everything on Stable and Evrything on balance..Just off a lil bit 6/10 Re$Tricted- Nice topical..Came very imaginery..Images came pretty nice to my head LOL..Vocab was better..Structure was aight so was the stable level..Came better wit the imaginery Level v/ReStricted Return the favor.. http://community.rapbattles.com/showthread.php?t=126947 |
Ok, besides that crap at the end about ~R~ wishing he could be black, talking about revenge on whites n all this bullshit, his verse was better. LE... don't use that battle format, it messes up the flow of your verse and the continuity of thought.
~R~ the problem with your verse was that it just sort of tailed off at the end, and sort of lacked direction throughout. you talked about stuff at the beggining, then turned it into a race thing, then just sort of ended... I felt more with LE's verse that he was building up to something, and had a nice close. Anyway, like I said, ~R~ got the better verse. Peace. |
L.E:
Good verse, it wasnt consistent, imagery department was lacking, i think u could have done a way betta verse if u focused. R: The startin was good, middle was decent, u lacked in the end..u was on and off, also missed the consistency, but u had betta imagery. nice verse. V/: R |
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