America is the only Monster
 

we're born into a mix of mixed messages, one being freedom/
innocence is being injected by the government because they have too much pride to free them/
known facts/ are blown and scratched/ away from normal cats/support from gats/ given by politcal gnats/, it's a set up for their formal traps/
how the fuck am i free if can't speak my mind without worryin about consquence/
how am i free if america is run by the dollar yet i work jobs for cents/
see, the government has created politcal bias for the common man/
so I can't speak without bein persecuted, we're no longer on common land/
it should be the "Divided states of america" we no longer united/
the closer a family the more distant the stranger unless they provide them/
they say we have freedom of speech, but they create groups who hate your social debate/
so i'm scared to state/ my ideas are great/ but others go irate/
we see what we want we no longer see what is real/
we spend billions on rap that teaches us nothing but to rob and deal/
the only reason hot emcees who spit truth are underground is because they've been buried/
But i dug em up...now their thoughts i carry/
i see what we've done...we've polluted our minds/
got stuck on some "freedom" shit but we've forgotten freedom is blind/
freedom is intangible, it's the right to think and speak for yourself/
presidents can Bomb a civilazation but damn those who speak for themself/
it's funny how we spend money on preventin the truth from bein heard/
but we have problems with employment and schooling and i feel thats absurd/
while academics get harder, school becomes more exclusive, decreasing educated individuals/
it's becoming habitual/ to follow oxymoronic rituals/
we pay money belonging to schools for radio time to show kids the leaches/
only they don't see it/ why don't we pay millions to have mos def teach us "what beef is"?/
the reason why is because individuality is a dying breed/
people bein lawfully punished for no reason there bein tried by greed/
it's no longer trial and error it's error and your finished/
as enjoy our "freedom" religions bein diminished/
will it be 500 years from now, the name jesus or allah won't ring a bell/
if we don't change direction/ than to all the next generations/
from heaven I'll look down on you in hell/
so after they destroy me for my views for the fact that I care/
I'll still be screamin "FUCK YOU AMERICA, YOUR MY ONLY NIGHTMARE!!"/

I know it's long..i'm tryin to elevate here..somebody give me some advice

it was a lil 2 long in the lines like u said but it was an ok thing u seem to be a good battler but u need to elevate a little more for open mic but a pretty good drop iight...

uppin

Im gunna start off by saying that I like this topic a lot. I like how you expanded on problems in the U.S. that effect everyone. You do however need to work on the structure and flow of the piece. Yet I see a lot of potential because i really enjoyed this and read ALL of it. Keep it up.


^^^^
Great line

Comming from a guy who is 6-6 u need To Elevate AlotI know it seems harsg but just wasnt very good.

it don't matter what your record is...makin fun of someone and tryin to speak your mind are two completely seperate things...and this might seem harsh..but that response was wack as fuck...how you gonna tell me I need to elevate and not tell me what was wrong with the verse?

thanks for the feedback saki