20/20 Vision
 

:: Verse 1 - Intro ::
Mic-circumcision despite the live-worthless-wisdom
I fight with perfect-vision, to slice eyes and plight cursed-children
Verse-villain, under one-alias with guns-trailing-rifts
Then flung-pales into, young-males and just barely-missed
Prevail-in, split-maneuvers indigenous which-can-bruise-ribs with viciousness

:: Hook ::
Put Ya Game On The Line-Y'all (C'mon)
Look At The Name And Say It Inna Rhyme-Y'all (Its-On)
Get Wrapped Up By A Macktruck On The Way Of The Mic
I Bash-Fucks who Act Tough, Wether it Be Day Or The Night

:: Verse 2 ::
Kiss the grid iron with an impediment, beefs I deaden-it
Graphite sledging necks and poisoning kids with slight lead-in-it
Life-severin, despite veterans who fight relentless
My vital vengeance is twice despised with rights-prevented
I like the sediment, upper-class battle-tactics
That shatter-glasses and aptly rattle-passages which blast-masses
Ass-slappin, chap-lip-graspin and rap's last wish
Knowledge I pass-it, hopin that half I said averagely is mastered
Savagely-attacked-yet I seize-the-moment

:: Hook ::
Put Ya Game On The Line-Y'all (C'mon)
Look At The Name And Say It Inna Rhyme-Y'all (Its-On)
Get Wrapped Up By A Macktruck On The Way Of The Mic
I Bash-Fucks who Act Tough, Wether it Be Day Or The Night

:: Verse 3 ::
I grieve-but-wont-miss, like snipers who see-but-dont-flinch
With ease-I-open, my third dimensional eye-sight with rhymes-tight
Laws I abide-by and drive-bys punches that slice-eyes
Separate a soul-from-force and throw-the-corpse
In a lone-dumped-gorge to hope-that-scores blown in fourths
I promote-that-war, motions are deadened by past-fights
While I have cats 'dying at the wrong moment' like 'flash-lights'
I bask-in-ice, the sudden-rush causes a bludgent-blush
Blood-and-lungs unattached from a un-plunged sudden-touch
I've done that much, I religiously sacrifice, with out asking-rights
Distracting life with scratch-fights of fat-dikes

:: Hook ::
Put Ya Game On The Line-Y'all (C'mon)
Look At The Name And Say It Inna Rhyme-Y'all (Its-On)
Get Wrapped Up By A Macktruck On The Way Of The Mic
I Bash-Fucks who Act Tough, Wether it Be Day Or The Night

:: Verse 4 ::
I'm surreal but rap-mics, my instincts are not-rural
But sometimes I'm 'over-done', like the 'amount of Pac-murals'
Bought-funerals, I laugh at the site-of-it
Colliding with kaleidoscopes is propriety the side-often
Strides-of-pens, vocal combat with broken strong-backs
Along-that, ascend the lines of songs spoken on-rap
Sharp-axe, surgically precise-swings and extremely slight-slicing
Life's-quite-seen as politely the right-thing
But bite-ing, is naively spiting ya own life-being
and any fledging riding dick rightly will lose the license-to-rhymin


RATE

That was hot dun i like tha rhyme scheme and how u ryhmed within tha rhyme constantly throught tha whole some it was tight keep doin ya thing kid id rate this an 9

man this was pretty good... pretty violent too... good vocab.. i like when u-use-words-like-that... but overall pretty good.. good flow and structure.. the flow was off at times but u picked it right back up.. good job man

thanks for the advice...uppin

wow i didnt expect this much...obviously your not new to rappin this was just hott....i really felt all the wordplay....i think wordplay and multies make an open mic stand out alot more than a verse without them and you definately had them here....good piece all together...and i was feelin the hook that was hott too...out of a 10 i would have to give you a 9.5...and it would have been 10 but your structure was choppy in a couple places but absolutely one of the hottest open mics in a while...
good shyt

~!1!~

thanks flow n i'll work on my structure..uppin

uppin

it was okay.............................................. .

it was okay?? yea...thats cool

fuck ok i liked that shit man 9.9 fa real nice drop

that shit was tite keep that shit commin !*!

i will...uppin