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-   -   (Insert Poem Title Here) (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=139437)

Ms. Get Gully 08-03-04 01:01 PM

(Insert Poem Title Here)
 
Lay Lifeless but living, Breathless But breathing
Heart split n broken but helplessly beating
Legs Torn from Torso, a blessed victim undressed
A vexed vision of never walking but running with success
Innocent by standers eyes stretch wider
While a dead corpse lay on its chest behind the bright divider...
So now you see the thin line between life and death?
Its nothing but murder scenes surrounded with yellow Tape, and No arrests
I'd rather be blind and dead to picture past existence
Than to be alive and witness pitiful present incidents
So you say ignorance is bliss,
But since when was it blissful to be ignorant
How can u be scared to death, but with living put no fear in it
When life is the struggle and death is when it disappears instant
So don’t speak on judgements, only on what u experienced
Tongue Departures from the mouth, yet still speaking the truth
Reaching the youths, holding grounds with no arms and feeling abused
Counted on by peers to be the platform with cushion when all will fall
Never paid the phone bill, don’t even have one but will always answer when u call
I write a poem with no name so thoughts can reign on my conscience
Insert Poem Title Here but fuck it to be honest
since when was a poem rated on its Name rather than the content
Jaws shattered from lies, its only right since u broke your promise
Organs gutted inside out but with the thought of hip-hop
its possible to stomach
No gag reflex yet throwing up wise words
to the close minds to be punished
One Lazy eye, other one’s cocked back
but Focused to see a straight path
Amen to that, a disgrace to black
he’s gotta molest a few kids to get some fame back?
There's always the question of what if and why
like Why do we get sleepy when we cry
or What if death is what we are living
and life is when we die



holla with feedback...on the poem not the structure n set up..just read and feel it.

G_$peed 08-03-04 01:23 PM

yo that shit was real i felt it alot of it ha ha ha
you a good poet.
peace
ps hit up my song DO YOU and leave some feed back

Ms. Get Gully 08-03-04 01:32 PM

true thanx upping

Idyllic Queen 08-03-04 03:01 PM

I think that best parts were the end lines and the beginning which always good to keep the reader interested. I thought you held alot of strong points in this, a good contemplation for sure. I really liked this and I like the rhyme scheme...I thought it was pretty hott..

Ms. Get Gully 08-03-04 07:30 PM

thank u

Ms. Get Gully 08-04-04 06:58 AM

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

LyrikalGladiator 08-04-04 09:35 AM

nice drop

i liked it from beginning to tha end

i cant think of n e titles for you but it was a pretty good peom

Ms. Get Gully 08-04-04 10:31 AM

.....not looking for ne body to give it a title..the title is already set "insert poem title here" lol

LyrikalGladiator 08-04-04 11:53 AM

^^^ o lol

u should go check out my poem and gimme some feedback

its called "your pain is my pain"

thanx

Ms. Get Gully 08-05-04 11:02 AM

upp for more feedback plz

Ms. Get Gully 08-07-04 02:02 PM

^^^^^^


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