freestlye mah final words
 

yo yo ahm up an down tha window wacthin fo mah
enomise ploting mah death
prayin on me to make one fatal mistake
drop to mah knees lord ahm beggin you plz
dont let them get me paranuyde off weed
unsucure thougts ratail mah brain ahm losen my mind
ahm goin insaine i got mah infer red beams locked on
semis coked on ready to blast ahm goin all out talkin them all
if not atleast one i live a thug life peaple say lifes an game to
be played but me i fuckin hate games survival of tha fistist to tha
day we pass on

Mad verse, came straight from the heart. Emotion is strong.

Damn peeps should be ashamed of themselves not giving feedback.

ok drop, sounded a bit tupac'ish..blah

You need to type better vocab, seen as this is a text peice.you should write your word's properly, I struggled to read thru this drop because of the way you wrote it.
This also could be the reason why people have veiwed it and not replied, because it isnt easy on the eye's to read.

keep dropping
keep elevating

thankz playa for tha feed back thas how i do all mah frees

yo yo ahm up an down tha window wacthin fo mah
enomise ploting mah death
prayin on me to make one fatal mistake
drop to mah knees lord ahm beggin you plz
dont let them get me paranuyde off weed
unsucure thougts ratail mah brain ahm losen my mind
ahm goin insaine i got mah infer red beams locked on
semis coked on ready to blast ahm goin all out talkin them all
if not atleast one i live a thug life peaple say lifes an game to
be played but me i fuckin hate games survival of tha fistist to tha
day we pass on

This wasn't very good there was hardly any rhymes the flow was basic structure unstable punches lacked...perhaps some emotion but it seemed like you were just speaking...3.5/10 you need to up that layout and add more rhymes...RTF on my open mic plz...

yo yo ahm up an down tha window wacthin fo mah
enomise ploting mah death
prayin on me to make one fatal mistake
drop to mah knees lord ahm beggin you plz
dont let them get me paranuyde off weed
unsucure thougts ratail mah brain ahm losen my mind
ahm goin insaine i got mah infer red beams locked on
semis coked on ready to blast ahm goin all out talkin them all
if not atleast one i live a thug life peaple say lifes an game to
be played but me i fuckin hate games survival of tha fistist to tha
day we pass on

work on ur spelling.i forced my self to finish reading this piece.spelling is discouraging.
ur rhyme scheme needs improvement.first line doesn't fit in at all.
emotion was there and after reading this twice i kinda get how u want me to see it.
if u want feed bak fix it up.make it easier to read.nobody wants to struggle to read.

damm it aint no battle it dont need punchs i aint dissin any it was jus a free tha top of mah head next time i wont post any thing damm but thankx for tha feed back aight ill check your shit out let me critsize your shit see how you like it it was only a free didnt realy wont feed back but if you didnt like it why give feed back cat allwayz wonna bring me down well fuck all yall an by tha way ahm disslexic if you didnt notice thas why mah spellin aint to good but i try but ye smash me down its aight