mechanical forces
 

I spit, to make the mic like a flammable torch
'It's understandable' my mind is a mechanical force
And I'm a cannibal my mandible is chewin' ya corpse'
I'm tyrannical, a vandle of intangible sorts
Not a mineral a mammal or an animal,
I'm. Metaphysical, the syllables in critical rhymes
Flows blowin' off ya limbs like invisible mines
Been invincible with rhymes since the biblical times
A warlord with a sword from the Mongul Horde
Speak the tongue of the lord, to bless my vocal chords
They tried to resurrect hip-hop, but faith is gone
So I'll take it over by force like Ghengis Khan
If you say it ain't raw, you better pray to Allah
Cuz I got an arrow that'll travel straight thru the jaw
Got breath control, flow like a ship with a sail
Divine when I spit, like if I sipped from the grail
Cuz I'm immortal

let me know what u think all criticism is appreciated

I spit, to make the mic like a flammable torch
'It's understandable' my mind is a mechanical force
/\ good opener stright to the title

And I'm a cannibal my mandible is chewin' ya corpse'
I'm tyrannical, a vandle of intangible sorts
/\ good wodplay aight rhyme

Not a mineral a mammal or an animal,
I'm. Metaphysical, the syllables in critical rhymes
/\ hmm no rhyme

Flows blowin' off ya limbs like invisible mines
Been invincible with rhymes since the biblical times
/\ good rhyming nice flow

A warlord with a sword from the Mongul Horde
Speak the tongue of the lord, to bless my vocal chords
/\ good rhyme

They tried to resurrect hip-hop, but faith is gone
So I'll take it over by force like Ghengis Khan
/\ Gone and khan don't rhyme...sorry

If you say it ain't raw, you better pray to Allah
Cuz I got an arrow that'll travel straight thru the jaw
/\ Neither does this

Got breath control, flow like a ship with a sail
Divine when I spit, like if I sipped from the grail
/\ good closer

Overall
This was an aight piece a lil short but you got some potential however u slipped on a couple of lines...no problem elevation should fix that good piece 6.5/10

good piece.vocab and structure=good.7/10.keep em comin'

definitly liked it, very very nice vocab.. and i like the way u ryhmed like a mother fucker lol... 8/10, thanks for the feedback on "We As Emericans"

yeh man this was a good piece you got potential and your ovcab was good.....slipped a lil here and there but it was a good read....
keep em comin
peace~1

Tight Piece Fam....8/10 Keep Dropping. :thumbup:

good drop son nice flow good vocab i liked it 7.5/10.....