POINT BLANK DISTANCE read it hook me up with some feed
 

im about to "open-up shop" in this "open mich drop"//
your tryin to "hop wihtout the hip" im goin straight to the top//
pakin more verses in my mainframe then animals on noahs ark//
my flow "bites like a shark" lights up night with a spark//
a grim stare from me leaves u without your vocal cords//
my tracks are the lords "cut u like them double edge swords"//
they flow straight to your heart "like cupid and his dart"//
wear my brains on my sleeve "like an external body part"//
you can see where "my rhymes live" right out in the open//
they stream off my brain "like water from the ocean"//
i got you chokin holdin your breath holdin your chest//
rest i think your stessed your heart just entered cardiac arrest//
my rhymes "suffocate u like a giant coke line" a gagger//
u cant have a purple heart if my "flows cut it out like a dagger"//
quick we need to get u in a ambulance fast//
docs gazin at u like u got 3 heads sayin how did he last//
his heart is wrangled and mangled looks like he got strangled//
from PntBlnkDistnce "i grabbed your soul" and got it tangled// :shoot:

good drop.just one or two lines in there was off but good drop.vocab was good too.work on ur wordplay.7/10.keep em comin'

hmmm good using of multis and metaphores....not bad vocabulary stucture could use a bit more work....but this aint that bad for a intro song...7/10...pretty good for a newbie i say

not bad....
flow good,
creativeness decent..
all around preety decent for a noob....

7.5 outta 10....

yo for a first drop this aint to bad... work on your wordplay and metas a bit... structure is good.... all in all this was a good drop for your first attempt...7/10... keep it up!

aiiiiiight for an newbie dis an good drop nice fam.........work on them meta'z and shit.....vocab is an must fam......fix the struture a lil bit str8in ya lines........but either way dis an good drop fam good shit ish....... 7/10 good drop from an newb


put down an feedback in my open mic

"diss to this kid at skool-smoke"


thanks mayne i preciated