a verse from my drinkin song
 

this is just a verse from my song called "I Drink" ( :spit: )

verse 1:
i drink till my liver collapse (yup)
gulpin all night then tha next day i cant relax
mixin so much chemicals, i'll kill myself
but i share tha wealth so i kill others and myself
and when im gone, im a hotbox
fuck round and have a glock in tha club and im bustin off shots
im so not sober on tha regular
i got Gin, Grey Goose, and Vodka mixed up waitin for ya
and before you sip this, let me warn you
you betta be sure bout what exactly im givin to you
shit i dont measure, i guess man
i be sippin as im trippin off dis Bicardi Li`mon man
so i dumb out
and if im hittin a bitch tonight, i strap up
nigga you know what im bout
cuz raw fuckin aint my style homes
man im tipsy, put tha hook back on...nigga im gone

***i know its simple but i like it cuz its true. i need some feedback! please***

a nigga cant get better if a nigga dont get advice. 4real

yea it is simple but u got some mad vocab words in there, u can WORK on ur multies a lil bit, punches werent SO bad lol not too bad for a new RV member n REALLY not to bad 4 a MI boi:), keep reppin D n keep spittin......8.5/10