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-   -   (x) CeEd vs MetaSkriptz (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=165124)

..Decree.. 12-10-04 04:39 AM

(x) CeEd vs MetaSkriptz
 
Battle Rules:
topical
15-15 lines
No Crew Votes
No Recycling
No Biting
topic-Christmas time

Minimum posts to vote: 20

Check in by: 12-10-04 at 07:39 AM

Must drop verse in 180 minutes after check in.

System 12-10-04 04:49 AM

(x) CeEd has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-10-04 04:49 AM.

System 12-10-04 05:06 AM

MetaSkriptz has ACCEPTED this battle on 12-10-04 05:06 AM.

(X)eed 12-10-04 05:11 AM

jingle bells! jingle bells! jingle all the way oh! wat fun it is to run on a 1 horse open sleigh!!!!!!!
Well thats wat they say, but forgettin all the needy,,
while all the other s bury into their gifts bein so greedy
without thinkin wat bout the others on earth,,,,
Xmas is bout love not gifts or a new shirt
but theres 1 "PRO" to it and not as many "CONS"
many familes come together and join as one.....
thinkin of jesus.......how he loved his peers,,,,,,,,
i hate it the way the rich swim in money while the others shed cold blooded tears.........

ON the eve of Christmas they go for shoppin
heartless while lookin at the poor ones coughin

lookin at the bright side kids finally hope for their wishlist
But think of the needy just 2 be alive for Christmas
the defination of christmas has changed from the past.....
" i wish i could live every christmas that i can grasp"
I will always love the 25th and live it forever
but Christmas is not bout gifts its bout, love please remember

(X)eed 12-10-04 05:24 AM

spit
 
man spit ur shit man

..Decree.. 12-10-04 05:36 AM

Topic Christmas Time

didnt use much vocab cause for this subject its uneeded


i awoke an with a quick stroke an thrust to the window i arise..
the tree prevokes the presents i look outside the sun an snow blinds my eyes..
parents still vast asleep excitment makes my hand shake as i tug the sheet..
screming wake up santa has arrived i gaze at the tree an see presents knee deep..
thoughts an images provide what santa may have broughtin..
action figures cops an open range villages oh jee what have i gottin..
omega trains b52 stealth bomber planes sweets in bundles excluding candycains..
fingers exhumed from all the unwravleing neverlasting i overlook the tags with names
sorry an monopoly games..as a kid previous christmas's couldnt be better..
but i cant belive this not what i wanted..as i open that same old love grandma sweater..
only one present left i hold my breath hoping its my new snow sled...
25 days for this present i pled i open an to shock its a ps2 game instead..
with a sigh a tear trickles into my eye i say "wow cool"ina struggle..
my mom with a solem smirk says theirs one more very suddle...
to the room an under the bed she led wraped in a bow of red..my new sled

..Decree.. 12-10-04 05:37 AM

i had other verses due smartass.....................

(X)eed 12-10-04 05:41 AM

uppin 4 votes
 
yo uppin 4 votesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

(X)eed 12-11-04 01:22 AM

upppin
 
uppin this shit aiight .................................................. ..................................................

(X)eed 12-11-04 06:11 AM

yo yo yo
 
yo yo yo uppin 4 votes //////////// honest votes shall be returned

4fil 12-11-04 06:47 AM

Voted For: MetaSkriptz

vote... MetaSkriptz

(x) CeEd..................

Well thats wat they say, but forgettin all the needy,,
while all the other s bury into their gifts bein so greedy
^^^^pretty weak start......
without thinkin wat bout the others on earth,,,,
Xmas is bout love not gifts or a new shirt
^^^^very force rhyme..... dont like it
many familes come together and join as one.....
^^^^thats pretty good.... gives some emotions to this
ON the eve of Christmas they go for shoppin
heartless while lookin at the poor ones coughin
^^^^NO....... keep all your shit as one... dont have all these smaller verses of two lines then have the last five sperated from the rest... have them all together
lookin at the bright side kids finally hope for their wishlist
But think of the needy just 2 be alive for Christmas
^^^^second line... proof read your shit dammit.... you just through away a line for that speeling crap...
I will always love the 25th and live it forever
but Christmas is not bout gifts its bout, love please remember
^^^^closer could have been done better......
(x) CeEd..... I dont think topikal is really you..... one major thing though... work on your damn spelling.... some verses that are horribly spelt.... wont even get read... nuff said

MetaSkriptz.............

good solid verse here....
i awoke an with a quick stroke an thrust to the window i arise..
the tree prevokes the presents i look outside the sun an snow blinds my eyes..
^^^good opener..... simple but very effective rhyme scheme
thoughts an images provide what santa may have broughtin..
action figures cops an open range villages oh jee what have i gottin..
^^^didnt really rhyme..... but it was a pretty good line
omega trains b52 stealth bomber planes sweets in bundles excluding candycains..
^^^good use of multies.....
only one present left i hold my breath hoping its my new snow sled...
25 days for this present i pled i open an to shock its a ps2 game instead..
with a sigh a tear trickles into my eye i say "wow cool"ina struggle..
my mom with a solem smirk says theirs one more very suddle...
to the room an under the bed she led wraped in a bow of red..my new sled
^^^very nice closer..... some good thought gone into this verse... rhyming was all pretty good... voacb... short but well used.... yeah overall i liked it...

vote MetaSkriptz

return the favour ok......

Alien 12-11-04 08:01 AM

This was feedback posted for (x) CeEd
 
Checking Polls.............................................

Know-Gimix 12-11-04 09:27 PM

Voted For: MetaSkriptz

arright, I wouldn't call this one sided cuz xceed didn't suck, I just really wasn't feelin it, It was kinda a tough read the way your lines kept switchin length, I see how you switched up the topic a little bit to try and make it interesting but you kinda went back and forth on it... meta I liked ur twist more- the verse in itself seemed to be more in a christmas spirit- easier read for me all in all, so im votin you.... please return the fav if u get a chance.... http://community.rapverse.com/showb...d=1#post1807015

(X)eed 12-12-04 05:11 AM

aiight thnx 4 dah honest votes y'all yo uppin 4 this shit..........keep it cummin

Abraxas 12-12-04 12:45 PM

This was feedback posted for MetaSkriptz
 
I've heard your name before.. i dont think your a newb.....
damn how did you get 3000 posts that quik..... you must've transfered your psots here..


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