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-   -   Father Please... (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=165624)

Speats 12-12-04 12:34 PM

Father Please...
 
iight heres a inner battle topic i used agains WickedClown...and im inpress by myself...here it is


Doctor's told that he only had 5 minutes to live,nothing to panic...
Maybe they could save him,my first time seing something tragic...
I heard some screems in room 27,still remember the number...
My dad passed away when i was eleven,i lost a family member...
Till then,here i go thinking of him again,still tears to my eyes...
my mom came to the house with new step-father...i wasint surprised...
she thaught it would'nt bother,but it did,so we hated each-other...
now today,i went to see his grave,told him how we behaved...
and that without him....i was feeling like a slave....i wished to see you again...
but for now...daddy...i will always remember you...never forget me...
as someone who helped me,i wanna tell you....rest in peace...

SR$ 12-12-04 12:55 PM

damn, dat shit is cold as hell. i gives it a 8.5/10. dats hot. check out my thread..."STRAIGHT FOOLIN!!!". i would put a link on here but i dont know how to so check it out when you get a chance. ~1~

GKillaz05 12-12-04 12:58 PM

yo, that shit was sick Spitty, you are gettin better kid. Just keep at it, I rate this about 7.5/10.

Speats 12-12-04 01:02 PM

damn thanks...uppin this...my first timwe having a good rate like this lol

MADDRAPPER 12-12-04 01:41 PM

content I'll give you a straight ten but the rhyming I can only give you a three because you rushed into this and didn't capture the true feeling of sadness

Speats 12-12-04 09:53 PM

upppin this...thanks for the feedback yall

nucleuss 12-12-04 09:55 PM

hot as fuck datz sum deep shit right here

Speats 12-12-04 10:23 PM

thanks alot....uppinn

Speats 12-12-04 11:03 PM

feedback please

Speats 12-13-04 07:42 AM

.......................

Speats 12-13-04 05:05 PM

uppin please....leave links so i could give you feedback too

Speats 12-13-04 06:30 PM

Up-in Plea-se...

Speats 12-13-04 07:43 PM

.........................

Speats 12-14-04 07:33 AM

uppin one more time

The Militant 12-14-04 08:03 AM

man i was taken back by that u got some good shit dwag u got deep emotions.


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