Dyme:4 da ladies *drop feedback*
 

wuts ya name ma, diamond aint u a sunshine
i think about u sometimes, i wanna hit dat 1time
hell yeah i'm a freak, but still da realest nigga in da streets
got mo DeNiro than scarface, let me take u 2 my place
got ya head right, i hope u givin head rite?
ya body bangin ma, ya vicki secret's dead tight
i keeps it crunk, i beat dat puss like eggwhites
can i get u drunk, den let u feel dis lead-pipe
yeah i got a gurl but i aint neva dropped no weddin rice
now scream my name shawdy,go head & say it twice
mami i run NC, tha realest coach since dean
and i got schemes 2 leave ya undawear wetta than dreams
let me caress ya body,rub u in baby oil shawdy
dat beautiful frame tha main attraction of tha party
got u screamin loud wakin up tha neighbors
taste so good like a peach flavored cream saver
shake it fast gurl, yeah shawdy i need yo touch
last lap dance u gave i almost busted a nut
we can chillin da cut, ya name is wut? o britt-any
well i like dem curves ma and i know u wanna get wit me
stick wit me, shawdy we could conquer tha world
but 1 thang i can promise is that u my only gurl

yo drop feedback

nice job :thumbup: .....you're elevating quickly........nice drop, only thing that ya need to work on is rhyme scheme and vocab...........these two lines didnt rhyme together, although i no wut you wuz trying to do:





.....just take a lil more time, and try to work on ya vocab a lil bit.......good drop........~1~

yeh man u have elevated some....work on that vocab and fix up ya rhyming and flow try addin multi's in it to help it......but this was decent for your skills......keep up the work and keep elevating man....

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http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=166580

uppin dis 1........if u gon read it at least drop feedback.

uppin...................................

Damn dawg...AInt know you had it in ya u horny bastard...lol...No doubt a nice drop dawg...Shit was hot...Nothing really to improve on to this...8/10 man real nice...1