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-   -   My Christmas (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=168121)

Dabatos 12-24-04 09:31 PM

My Christmas
 

*This Was Keyed, due to me just being in the mood*

My Christmas


Sorrounded by children's laughter, crumbled gift wrappers..
At this very moment, familly is the only thing that matters..
The smell of the Christmas Tree, The room filled with Joy..
Children's day's made worth while, all cuz of one small toy..
For dinner is the roast chicken with warm mash potatoes..
Don't forget the Honey Baked ham, fully covering the table..
It's like heaven on earth, everyone's face with happy expressions...
Especially when all my love ones recieve their christmas presents..
This is what i believe, how you should always feel in Christmas...
Since what I've showed you was what I wrote in my santa's wishlist..

*I know it's short but please leave feedback*

Speats 12-25-04 12:24 AM

damn man...pretty fucking dope lol

Structure:9/10
flow: 9/10
vocab:10/10
Imagination:once again : 9/10

dope ... keep writting seriously...

Insight. 12-25-04 03:10 AM

good. keep it up:thumbup: peep mine as well. Unmatched Gifts

structure: 8/10
imagination: 8/10
vocab: 8.5/10

Dabatos 01-07-05 02:07 AM

uppin..............

DQ 01-18-05 03:49 PM

Awwwww, i wish it was Xmas again...Emotion was good, vocab was okay...liked how you described it in such a vivid way...good short drop!

DQ


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