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-   -   down to one bullet (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=17001)

Acidic 07-14-02 10:13 PM

down to one bullet
 
tis maybe short who knos

wen u first get a gun its usauly filled wit one bullet//
u wanna feel ta kick back so u pull it//
but now ur down to no bullets so u need to buy some more ammunition//
now ur bein hired to complete some missions//
but u forget to stock up on tha bulletes so u go in wit just tha gun filled//
shootin up places and ta cops come to only find out tat blood has been spilled//
so ur cleanin out tha gun and find out tat u have 1 bullet left//
now ur bein called in to commit a theft//
ur on ur way out tha door but before u leave u grab an extra clip//
as ur goin down to ur car u slip//
tha gun falls and tha last shot was fired at a woman who is now layin dead//
tha bullet was logged inside her head//
to be more exact in tha middle of tha brain//
and now ur feelin tha pain//
of tha cuffs around ur wrists//
now ur livin behind tha bars and wonderin how am i gonna live through tis//
tis is just one thing tat couldve happened wen u were down to one bullet//
u killed an innocent person even if u didnt pull it//

part two comin soon

LACK OF LOGIC 07-14-02 10:41 PM

tight nit pa

Acidic 07-15-02 12:04 AM

uppin for what others think

LaDy TrInItY 07-15-02 02:11 AM

hmm pretty good....i didn't like tha topic real well..but its got a good flow..much luv..God bless..1..

Acidic 07-15-02 06:22 AM

uppin

Johnny 6-feet 07-15-02 06:35 AM

i dunno, i felt the vocab was lacking and the rhymes were pretty straightforward. i think you should aim for an original topic if you want to shine on this board.

post on.
pzz.

kmfrob 07-15-02 06:40 AM

topic wise this aint really anythin i wanna read the vocab was aight but nuttin really stood out but the flow seemed alrite it never really fell of or anythin. but still keep spittin just change the bullshit topic and check mine bent politicians

Remy Royalties 07-15-02 06:40 AM

as said before, its lackin a few things.. ..you have the potential to be a good story-type lyricist if you word ya rhymes better.. ..and apply more creativity so the reader doesn't get bored with it nah mean.. ..keep spittin


¤GhOzT¤

Acidic 07-15-02 06:47 AM

thanx for tha feed back yall go and check part 2 aight


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