better structure
 

I always leave a new thread to break bread
and if u don't like my shit i'll just bust lead
go ahead get capped til your bloody red,
I'm the type of rapper that inspires
cuz my lyrics stays as fresh as brand new tires
my pliers(=style) easily cuts the wires(other rappers)
and if u want to be as ill as me this is what it requires,
rhyming, structure, and perfect timing
and if u still suck then keep on trying
but u gotta keep ur rap battles from dying keep it maltiplying
and you'll remain in the game
that's the kind of shit that makes u claim the fame
even if the wack ones yours to blame
i keep my shit raw and ill
so i can lyrically give u a hyped up thrill
without taken an ectasasy pill
i'ma whale that'll eat u like krill
this is so good that i'll probably recieve a plaque
if u read this shit holla and up me with some feedback

ummmmmmmm no
ur wack
ur not a gangster get over it

ur no t either bitch

u rite this is betta struture, but it can get betta than that