medicine vs ULTIMATE SPY
 

Battle Rules:

6 lines
No Crew Votes
No Recycling
No Biting

Minimum posts to vote: 20

Check in by: 02-27-05 at 11:07 PM

Must drop verse in 1440 minutes after check in.

ULTIMATE SPY has ACCEPTED this battle on 02-27-05 10:22 PM.

ULTIMATE SPY has ACCEPTED this battle on 02-27-05 10:25 PM.

medicine has ACCEPTED this battle on 02-27-05 10:25 PM.

Do not post your verse here. You must use the form in the first post

try and drop pretty soon i made this to long let get this shit runn'n

o yea 6 lines ... u a alias or some shit?.................

My rhyme,s performed so nicely , you should just sit and listen ,I'm so percise with this device ,that you have no chance of winnin. So you just stand there grinnin, while I'm crushin your text verse, this is only in writing , with percussion it gets worse. I'm touchin my opponents right through the computer, while your discussin with your husband which hat looks cuter.

this kid in denial . like a fat kid try'n to lose his flab
dosent realize can't lose it with "...eight... minute abs"

ain't no play'n "Doctor". keep your hands to .."your-self"
i'm out of your grasp. like the "Medicine "on the "top shelf"

i'll bust ya lyrical "hymen" .. be4 u can say "But the lord says!"
like a game of ["Simon" says]. you lose.jus luckly you aint dead....


who knew rap coudl be so much fun! ha

but yea playing doctor .. a term for kids touch'n em selves
hymen is the...popp'n the cherry

ick i didnt like my verse now that i jus read it ha ... o well ummm upp'n i return all honest votes...with honest votes

thanx 4 the battle. it was enjoyed but i dont think u had it that time

Voted For: ULTIMATE SPY

yo, goin here for better structure cuz it was in bars... even though spaces between lines is wack. fix that. but here also was attempts at wordplay. awful attempts and this battle was all around bad. but go ahead and elevate

Voted For: ULTIMATE SPY

wow, this is kinda a bunk battle, but spy gets it, heres what i think

medicine
>My rhyme,s performed so nicely , you should just sit and listen ,I'm so percise with this device ,that you have no chance of winnin.
-not really a punch.....3/10
>So you just stand there grinnin, while I'm crushin your text verse, this is only in writing , with percussion it gets worse.
-uh, no punch at all, went no where, 2/10
>I'm touchin my opponents right through the computer, while your discussin with your husband which hat looks cuter
-uh, okay play at personal, but very weak wordplay 4/10

overall: 9/30....wel, not a bad start man, but you gotta up alot of things. first, work out some sort of basic structure that you can build a verse off, dont just write it out like your writing a story, make it easier for the voters....next, even out your lines and develop a continuous flow throughout your verse, or else your punches and personals will lose alot of their effect.....next, punches, you have to aim them directly at your opponent, dont softly word them, or hold back anything, you want to make your punch stand out and leave your voters with a sense that you've made an impact, also, be straight.....personals, you had the right idea, just need to up/elevate wordplay and complexity, and you should be fine....

ultimate spy....i dont really need to go through your verse, but yours wasnt that great either, flow was off a little, kinda came weak, opener coulda been worded better, same with closer, had some good ideas and your punches hit harder, so thats why you get my vote...

v/'spy

This was feedback posted for medicine
 

Voted For: medicine

i gots to say i vote for medicine....
ultimate spy:
your verse was basic and your punches were weak
you both need to work on vocab and more complexity to your verse.
medicin:you have to work on your structure...instead of writing in paragraph form write like this
...........................................beam
...........................................team
like that then your verse will be a lot better....but the reason you got my verse was u had a lil more complexity to ur verse and ur punches were more creative and hit harder.....1