envy
 

One girl, growing up in this world with moral ideals and ambition
Not interested in socializing she was breaking a teenage tradition
On a mission to achieve a journey where she cried many tears
Previously ignoring the remarks and comments of her peers
Bullied every day, still she went the right way, head in a book
No-one’s friend, forget a stare she couldn’t even get a second look

Writing rhymes in her spare time, that was a little secret she’d never tell
looks like she hit a “block” though, coz from her 17th, she couldn’t “flow” as well
Trying to open her eyes but its hard, trying to speak but it ain’t working
Trying to control her body but the “pilot” can’t “fly it” so its “jerkin”
Her fam all around her, mama praying that somehow she’d get better
Daughter picking up a pen to write, but can’t even form one letter

Its terrible, a life almost lost coz someone was so hated
Visited by the culprit was no surprise, that sorry was belated
24 hour care’s what she needs now, no chance of higher education
So her parents will never be able to witness her graduation
still they thought that at least she would be with them to stay
that didn't happen and on her 18th birthday she passed away

(feed?)

This was pretty nice...vocab was good...emotion was good...imagery was good and by the way you write I can tell it was personal....

nice drop mizz fyre u got some skills there girl

like the vocab good choise of words a little bit of emotion was shown not bad i like the whole verse it was a good decent drop keep up the good work ma!

see u around

8/10

Heat go accept our battle.

Iight shit was nice i liked the imagination nice structure was feeling the vocab everything was good hit drop 8.5/10 keep elevating

once again you have anotha beautiful piece this was one of my favorites from you you have a way wit wordz that not alotta ppl on this site have your emotion is alwayz there and your vocab was good as alwayz and the imagery was amazing keep up da good work grl
return the favor on Love Till Death link in sig

yeah this was a very interesting & in depth piece...structure was on point...vocab/wordplay was good...meta's were hitting...multi'z all thru this o.m. i like it overall quality on it is 9.0/10 keep up the good work ma

damn girl dis was hott!! good vocab, emotion was dope, structure on point.........but on da real dis was hype! hit me up fo a collab sometime or something......keep it up...1

Yo I Neva Diss Anyones Keystyle Cause You Neva Know What They Felt When They Put It Down,

But Ma You Did Your Thang On This One Vocab And Your Imagination Put It All Together Good Shit.....

Keep It Up...

wordizzle to this piece....emotion...was feeling, reminds me of things ive seen in alotta ways...easy to relate to, because we have all gone through this, either the one being bullied or the bullyier...you put things nicely into perspective and was easy to obtain an image of what was happening....although, some lines (a little criticism) seemed poorly worded and the flow was off a little....but overall, very nice drop...i enjoyed it, keep up, keep writing, good job............(ps, check out my piece)...thanks

Sup ma,

Very nice drop,... Vocab was nice didn't over do it but you managed
to give me a view of where the girl was coming from in the verse.

Emotion was nice again gave me a clear view of the verse as a whole.
Flowed really well.

Very nice drop Mizz

1~

thanx for the feed ya'll........

nice drop here nice flow structre was good too rhymes were tight good emotion good creativite too please rtf in my link in my sig

chea coo piece ya know good to see usses droppin hot shit...um...

vocab whas nice...*big words used correctly*
emotion was tight um..u handled yo bidniss

-D.Truth