Tired of it(freestyle)
 

Im tryin to show mautirity but its diffucult
When some dude started the beef and its visable/
That he wanted atttention there was no prevention
Im in a beef and its crazy it wasnt my intention/
To start to diss his girl i was wrong i apolige
But my pride is something that i cant comprimise/
So i stood up to him and we both wouldnt buge
It was more than a feud it was more than a gurge/
It was like a war but it was my fault i let it escalte
Arent we here to get better and to elevate/
But sometimes we get so caught up in shit
I dissed him and just kept uppin the bitch/
So people would realize what a phonie he was
But now i think whats the matter with bein in love/
I guess i got so deep in it that i wasnt thinkin straight
Im endin the beef but i wonder if its way to late/
But it dosent matter cause from my side im callin a truce
That goes for DAZ..LEGEND..FI-DEL..CHALK CLOROX..and DUECE/

say im tryin to be like eminem what ever i just wanted to get my point across...and im sick of the beef and shit no more beef for me im a vegitrian now lol...

link

http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2077325

not bad, u got potential

flow was good....
vocab was pretty basic....
stayed on point of topic.....

some spelling mistakes in there.......

basically.....u need to work on ure vocab for ure drops...use a bit more complex shit and get some hot wordplay in there....just be more creative n shit.

overall 6/10

thanks for the feed back man i started reading the dictionary about 2 weeks ago

^^ya i did that when i first strated too.n its funny you said "act like em"..
cuz i thought the same shit when i was readin it...it had that feel to it..
it was decent man, way ta man up n squash that shit.....good job X-CELL..
.
PZ

thanks for the feed back man i actually liked ur diss to me

uppin.............................................

uppin ladies......................................

yo.. so this was a freestyle right? well if it was, its pretty good, since you sed that on the tittle i tried to imagine you freestyling while reading it and if it was live, it could sound ever better.. The vocab was on point.. but the flow was like too short you know? iono if u get that but yea.. i liked how you talked about u admitting you did something stupid and apologized but they wouldn't except it.. but yo.. instead of ending a verse like.

But it dosent matter cause from my side im callin a truce
That goes for DAZ..LEGEND..FI-DEL..CHALK CLOROX..and DUECE/

end it like

But it dosent matter cause from my side im callin a truce.....
That goes for DAZ..LEGEND..FI-DEL..CHALK CLOROX..and DUECE....

u see at the end of each line.. those periods?? yea cuz if u use bars it looks newbish u get me? lol.. nice verse though... lookin forward to more..
7/10

thanks for the feed back man uppin................

Uppin.............................................

yeah, I like this. So trying to be like Eminem huh. Well, than I cal look for you in audio too? Cuz eminem is SICK with the words. text means shit to voical.
But this piece overall was dope.

sweft

thanks for the feed back...but i didnt say im tryin to be like eminem i said "say im tryin to be like eminem what ever i just wanted to get my point across...and im sick of the beef and shit no more beef for me im a vegitrian now lol..."

good drop. I see you felt the pressure,so you decided to end it...lol..why are you not ending it with me?lol. Im just fucking with you.
good drop,maybe we could collab sumtime.