sitting here reading old love letters
they always seemed better when i first got them
but i guess for now they have lost their effect
the novelty of it all has simply worn off
well i guess i've written enough . i really have
i shouldn't really dwell on it all that much
it ended because we both had , had enough
you never got your chance to ever take a hold of my hand
i'd love to forget , but from time to time i find something that makes me reminisce
i wonder about "the what ifs" and if you ever grew up
i always told you i would write. and just keep it simple
just so anyone who ever got the chance could read
and see exactly what i meant, just like me
you were blank like this piece of paper before it met ink .
the anticipation , for every moment was just contradicting
because when we were together all we could think of
was what is going to happen next instead of present moment
it was so controversial we were truly the best at what we do
passed out , pierced by the shards of your liqueur glass
but before you heard you tilted your head and gave a laugh
you were young and in love , they were jealous for no reason at all
do you still consider me , anything at all?
what were we thinking of? i bet if we knew
i would have never called you. i would have just abandoned it
but then again i probably would have wondered
starting over , becoming someone new was tough to do
it went by so fast we went from t-shirts to overcoats
i spent far to much time on what you did then
when you were to focused on being more open
trying to come to a point i was at when you just arrived
surprised that we survived any of the falls at all
but that was then , this is now
i'm moving on to college getting out of this city
throwing away everything that can be linked to my past
but keeping some things because they mattered
before i go to chicago i'll work up some courage
dial your number and just as it rings i'll be flooded,
you'll pick up , and say "who is this" and i'll say "you know who"
wait for the silence and say sorry for never really loving you