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CeleriTy vs l i n e .
Battle Rules:
20 - 30 Lines No Crew Votes No Recycling No Biting Topic: The Moons Shadow Minimum posts to vote: 20 Check in by: 05-16-05 at 09:33 PM Must drop verse in 120 minutes after check in. Closed - Expired / old battle win |
CeleriTy has ACCEPTED this battle on 05-16-05 09:06 PM.
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l i n e . has ACCEPTED this battle on 05-16-05 09:07 PM.
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My kettle’s steaming, the plight of a Jekyll evening Beware, because tonight, the Devils breathing A gentle screening, but now and proud, the mask is released For the sadistic hunt, as my victim runs, I attack for the feast Stab at the meat, she runs trying to hide in the corner She screams for her life in horror, I simply strive off the torture I axed her leg, as my wrath is plagued I make love to her, while she suffocates in a plastic bag Her demise approaches, I look inside her organs Now the water on her eyes - distorted, she realizes her fortune I press against her chest, caress her breast, she’s the angel of death Her fatal like breath erects when I start to strangle her neck As I lift the blade, I see her drift away, but her pulse returned Despite her body in disarray, ripped with stakes, she convulsed and squirmed She re-grouped and pleaded, she prayed, and begged So, I made her puke and eat it, then mutilated her head Watched the blood splash to the floor, as my joy re-kindled But, her heart pumps no more, and my void continues My umbrage love is, left dust and bones, as they float to sea I rush to home, as the family man, I’m suppose to be....... good luck bro... |
The Moon's Shadow..
We're unreal to extraterrestial beings of fate and fortune, Who paint portraits of contextual thoughts and corpses. Putting emphasis on contrast, adding value to saturation, Giving passion to shades like a newborns concentration.. Anticipating the future with psyche paintings from scripts Their rituals consist of praying for a never fading analysis A solar eclipse, leaves shadows lingering for mere minutes (Something an artist has never been able to capture in it) Tryin to finish, a picture with shadows to explain existence Their brains ache as the solar eclipse begins to diminish.. They count it is a surreal event, a mirage of timeless ages Darkness falls again, barraging a prophet's scriptless pages Time rages on, the color of Death is chased off Earth's face The moon loses it's shadow and returns to it's old ways. Cold days in space, bring notions of evil spiritual intellect, The darkside of the moon has heard of but never seen it yet. An eventful day, darkness begins to grow in prosporous ways In the shadow of the moon, people live their voluptious days As star-gazers pray, evil is cast away in the moon's shadow Insignificants breathe a sigh of relief...living in a fools pascal. |
Voted For: CeleriTy
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^doesnt count, explain it.........................
up |
Voted For: CeleriTy
LoL Nice Topic!Celebrity Ur Linez Were Pretty Basic! (Celeb) Wordplay>6/10 Scheme>6/10 bein on Topic>5/10 (Line) Wordplay>8/10 Scheme>7.5/10 Bein on topic>9/10 Vote>>Line Nice Topic Battle Tho Removed.. unexplained |
LoL WTF i Said My Vote Was LINE!............................................. .................................................. ....................................
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This was feedback posted for l i n e .
uppin this joint for the fam, LINE holla at dude wit some honest votes nah mean
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This was feedback posted for l i n e .
decent.....i think line took this one though...word
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upping nigga boo........................................
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Voted For: CeleriTy
This was a good battle. Both stayed on topic and followed the concept good all the way through. I was feeling both verses on emotion..good shit here to both of you guys. Im not going to do a complete verse breakdown because there really isnt a point for that in a topical but I will explain.. Celerity had some good shit and so did line. Both stayed on topic and keep the emotion strong throughtout their entire verses. Line had some good quoteables.. We're unreal to extraterrestial beings of fate and fortune, Who paint portraits of contextual thoughts and corpses. That was nice. It flowed well and the emotion was good here. Nice shit and mos def a good way to open ya verse. Celerity also had some good bars that deserved to be quoted.. A gentle screening, but now and proud, the mask is released For the sadistic hunt, as my victim runs, I attack for the feast This was really dope. It followed topic really good and was strong with emotion in both lines. The rhyme scheme here was also nice. Good shit here and nice creativity. -------------- Overall, Id have to say that Celerity won this. He was more complex and he was just more creative throughout his entire verse. Both came well though and stayed on topic. Good job bpth and stay up. Vote- celerity |
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