O.V Dose (3-0) vs. Dizzee Rascal (1-0)
 

Checking in goodluck man

check....u2...it looks like i got one that will show this time :)

Topic : Poker Face


I brandish my poker face whenever life turns ugly
My lack of emotion quietly humbles somebody above me
in their own made up food chain which has invisible boundaries
I dont respond to people who think they have to put dow the weak
to make themselves feel better about their crippled hearts
I use a blank face...its mission is to guard my beauty marks
My ego starts to step in using cruel words as weapons
It wont stop until all of your flas are spotted like leopard skin
I wont let it begin, its hateful nature is laced with ignorace
Take a deep breath ...pretendin yall are imagination figments
When im finished protecting myself i set out looking for someone else
Who I can share my experiences with including the anger i felt
They try to help but every suggestion they lendin ends up in violence
Why would I beat a guy when the only thing he struck is a pose
Its senseless like a numb deaf blind guy missing his tounge and nose
I show my emotions to only those who are closest
It'll be a cold day in hell before my heart starts to open
I hope they dont recognize what my secret weapon is
and thats the reason why i try to keep my lips expressionless

Ok Poker Face - Hence Satan's poker fate of world etc

Fire melting satans eyes a place full of lies
Despise the witheld spiritual ritual war cries
Tries a stable assault his opinions diabled
Dancing with jesus and his army of angels
Able to neglect the glands of famine that stands
Like massacred fetus souls of innocence in his hand
Angels in amazement lucifers expressions adjacent
But his blood froze like periods of glaciation
Abrasive he held an empire declined to perspire
Desired for sweat to steam on satans eternal fire
Choir of angels couldnt comply questioning why?
The try gambling souls for an outcome of lies
The sky rains blood clouding death in the cards
Promosing souls captured in tortured minion yards
Shards of vanity dictated in emotions so there no sanity
So as satan folds his set so does the rest of humanity
In the place he neglected to show the fate on his face
And our souls on opaque cards cus they loosing with no trace........

It wont stop until all of your flaws are spotted like leopard skin*

aiight lets get some votes on this

O.V.Dose: strongest aspect of your piece in my opinion was the emotion and how you portrayed the thoughts and feelings of the person. Imagery was there but not that much. Enjoy how you went into detail about the reason of the poker face, different scenes and switching back and forth between several emotions. Flow was decent, bit off here and there, some rhyme words didn't come out the right way and all that. Structure was cool, had few insightful lines in there that made the reader stand still and think bout it, this I liked very much.


Dizzee Rascal: what I enjoyed so much about your verse was how you managed to combine strong imagery and raw emotion, your lines were packed with both aspects that made this an interesting piece to read. Flow was good, kept ya lines rather short, had nice sound expression...this all improves your flow. I like how you approached the topic, based on Satan and such, didn't actually expect any of you to come with it like this so that's was a pleasant surprise. Structure was okay, went indepth on the matter as well, pictured different scenes.

In the end, my vote goes to Dizzee Rascal, he had this edge to his piece, different approach and all that.

O.V Dose-

Nyce concept 2 your peice. emotion wuz really strong throughout, not enough imagination in the portrayal ov ur ''poker face''...concept wasnt AS creative as dizzee rascal, but it wuz still strong & pretty insignhtful, culd ov expresed ur lines a lil better in places, few ov 'em were mad stretched so it took the sting out ov the flow as u read along, good emotion, u beat dizzee rascal in dat aspect ov ur peice, but da imagination an creativity ov ur scheme lacked a little..

Dizzee Rascal-

Really nyce drop, emotion culd ov been a lil more deep & meaningful, but styll u got da win, good vocab, nothin wuz stretched each line wuz short & str8 to da point in ur peice, imagination wuz goiod, u had a more creative concept & scheme 2 ur topic thats fo sure, creativity in which u used ''the devil''throughout wuz strong, original...an very very diffrent 2 O.V Dose but datz wat i lyked most about ur peice, real good creativity in ur concept

vote=dizzee rascal