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never die alone
(flashback)
where did i go n wut did i do,every time i turn around im lookin at you, i cant escape this devil every corner i turn im stuck starin at you, ur a figment of my imagination not a prophet,standin here wastin time wit u aint uppin my profit,stop it back the fuck off b4 u make me pop it// a carbon copy of myself lost in bliss,wit blood covered wrist, stuck 2 my self like siamese twins joined at da hips, the controversy im a blood n he's a crip,how's dat 4 a cinematic twist, im like a weird twist of eminem & ludacris,lost in a contract who's deal is this// forget bout the word play cuz i play words when da mic breaks, its dat original allik war from da tri-state,still comitted 2 shit wit high stakes, maybe i should drop da game so i dont cause another heartbreak, raw killa back at rapverse,destroyin 1 fruitloop at time like im snackin on a pack of starburst,leavin my enemies skippin da nurse,layin dead in a hearse,sicker than cousin's n intercourse respect da don of a dyin race// bottom line never ride alone,lost in a zone,prone 2 counter these cowards wit raw bars n never die alone,similar 2 three 6 mafia's the most known unknown,cuz my names been heard n known,but my diabolical existence in da game still questioned unknown,im like macalicalcin in his prime home alone,stand here on my own 2 feet tryin 2 control my inner demons n 2 never die alone!!!!:shoot::thefinger: |
c'mon niggaz n niggets i know u read this or saw post wut u think uppin 4 replies dont sleep on this
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This was real dope playa. This was much better than open mics iv dropped in the past. Seriously -WOAH!
I didnt realise there was this much potential wiv you. You would be a great topical head. I think this is much better than ur battle i seen. I like this little bit a lot Quote:
If the crew see this you are in bro |
lol ayt kool dawg holla atcha lata i jus got off work so im goin 2 bed thanx 4 da feedback i see u liked dat line....im crazy when i wanna but dope n e givin time g peace:thefinger::shoot:
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Wassup mayne yo' thanks on the feedback mah real appreciate it..Anyways this was a nice drop right here. where did i go n wut did i do,every time i turn around im lookin at you, i cant escape this devil every corner i turn im stuck starin at you, ^^^^Dayum, this was a nice opener, had a twist in the rhyme scheme like that nigga Grafh does..and hes crazy dough ur a figment of my imagination not a prophet,standin here wastin time wit u aint uppin my profit,stop it back the fuck off b4 u make me pop it// ^^^^^Hmmm, nice lines but I thought the bar itself was too long a carbon copy of myself lost in bliss,wit blood covered wrist, stuck 2 my self like siamese twins joined at da hips, ^^^^^Nice multis and flow.. the controversy im a blood n he's a crip,how's dat 4 a cinematic twist, im like a weird twist of eminem & ludacris,lost in a contract who's deal is this// ^^^^^^Once again, nice multis and flow..bar was long once again forget bout the word play cuz i play words when da mic breaks, its dat original allik war from da tri-state,still comitted 2 shit wit high stakes, ^^^^^Liked the second line maybe i should drop da game so i dont cause another heartbreak, raw killa back at rapverse,destroyin 1 fruitloop at time like im snackin on a pack of starburst,leavin my enemies skippin da nurse,layin dead in a hearse,sicker than cousin's n intercourse respect da don of a dyin race// ^^^^^^These were some sick lines, but u took too long to rhyme with break and shit bottom line never ride alone,lost in a zone,prone 2 counter these cowards wit raw bars n never die alone,similar 2 three 6 mafia's the most known unknown,cuz my names been heard n known,but my diabolical existence in da game still questioned unknown,im like macalicalcin in his prime home alone,stand here on my own 2 feet tryin 2 control my inner demons n 2 never die alone!!!! ^^^^^^Different rhyme scheme here but its a still dope finisher strengths-You have a good flow, nice multis, vocab is nice and wording was dope weakness-Your bars were too long, try evening and shortening them, it helps alot with the flow aswell. Overall this drop was dope famz, keep doin' u HoLLa |
yo dawg no problem after all these sites we judges n nariators arent we...lol ne ways thanx for da constructive criticisim every 1 tell me my bars r 2 long n shit but i do it still guess it jus sets me apart from every1 u kno makes me unique n e ways peace uppin 4 more feedback
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NICE ONE MATE! That's a wicked rhyme you wrote! Cheers for checkin' out my shit. It's hard to get any feedback when you live in the UK cos not many people are into the same shit i am. Big up yourself for your rhyme!
Oh yeah, i'm gonna post some more on my break at work, so check 'em out. |
ayt thanx 4 da feedback homie be kool n stay up 1 c'mon people u dont kno wut u missin must peep holla on fire 1
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uppin this track so peeps like da cat talkin shit actin like gods of war jus lettin herbs in or sumtin cuz ive seen the shit our crew be droppin shit nice n they dont ask people 2 join they crew 4 no reason n e ways peace big up fam 4 da respect peace holla
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