Go about to flow clout don’t know the route to Wal-mart
 

Go about to flow clout don’t know the route to Wal-mart
A brother divine but color blind can’t see the sign all dark
And my bright lights don’t work and its night in legit fear
After I hit a deer trying to cross the road, driving and surviving hear
In the graphic traffic these pedestrians are testing me hard to steer
they walking slow dang live corrupt and ready to give up
Right here in traffic but feel divine my wheels shined my luck
Is so so comes to coffee drink Folgers true like soldiers do
Need a cup to calm my nerves so I can palm words and crew
Like Shack do basket balls make drastic calls on my cell phone
The cost is great “boss I’m gonna be late” “well stay home
Take sick leave didn’t have a trick up my sleeve “boss can I come
In late?” that was a dumb mistake “oh yeah come on in then”
That son-of-a- gun grin I was done in that’s when trouble begin
Lost four hours the cost tower a thug at best but a drug
Test required hell got fired they founded some shit in y blood

ok 2 things. 1- this should be in freestyle not in open mics. and 2- some of the words didnt rhyme....
u could have used some multies and some rhymes were forced.... really aint no story behind this.... didnt really get my attention either..... no hate. but ive seen some of ur shit, and its been better. keep trying kid......

oh yea and u need ur too links or it will be closed... u tend to forget that

look you lying just tell how many responses i got on them

wut am i lying about?
ive seen other drops of urs that have been better and gotten more responses then this..
dont know y u hating.

Not On This Site Naw Cats On This Site Be Hating

uhm structure was good man flow was alright you have to change some lines though because some dont rhyme with each other like fear where is the rhyme for that? cant seem to catch it man vocab you could step it up a bit kind of small vocab here easy words to rhyme with try stepping it up with that see how it works other then that this piece was cool man keep it up

my link (http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2812161)

my link (http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2812860)

thats wassup ,thats some stuff i would rap about if i was bored,but i liked it