ay yo trip
 

if you readin' this, you oughta' consider yourself lucky,
you witnessin' the birth of the best new emcee,
i'm listenin... lookin... learnin... bookwormin,
burnin through your rhymes like General Sherman
theres a new cat in town and he ain't meow-in
my barks worse then my bite, throwin it down every night
lookin for challenges, all i get is practice meat,
if you fit the above description, you best take a seat
better preheat your rhymes, set the oven to 350
gettin nervious now? all sweaty n' shifty
long as you keep yoself in check,
get back to sweepin the poop deck,shufflin around like that mufuka Shrek,
so if you think you can handle this, gimme yo best diss,
you'll find me sippin on Cris, shootin to kill, not to miss.

ey im new at all this so i'd really appreciate any feedback/critique/comments y'all might have.

better preheat your rhymes, set the oven to 350

that lines tight, the whole thing is tight

yeah that line was tight, but rest... I don't agree with that, it's just simple, too short, the flow was choppy, and the concept is often hear around, you did have some decent wordplay though... props for that... should have tried to make it longer yo...

Peace

You said"theres a new cat in town and he ain't meow-in
my barks worse then my bite, throwin it down every night" That was phat....Keep it coming kid....HOLLA

yo thnx for tha positive feedback. i kno the flows short, but first time, first rhyme, just a lil intro to wut yall r gona see.