For my brothers best interest
 

i'm new to the game, this is my first real verse. critism is appreciated.

this is dedicated to my brother who is with a golddigger!!!

Bitch, blonde hair and blue eyes/
A verse derived to make you realise/
That she ain’t nothing but a bloodsucker/
With you until you dry up like a mother fucker/
You think she loves you, whilst you away she does nothing but play you/
Look around most people see it, some can’t though just a shame that in that few/
There is a decent person, in a fake relationship/
She feeds you false lines and you just take that shit/
She says, lets go to the cinema and then a restaurant/
Sure what flix shall we see, and what sorta meal do you want/
She makes the decisions every time/
Most people would say why am I trippin?, that’s just being kind/
But you and me both know that had you said no/
You and her would have been over, ain’t that so/
When the end of the night comes and its time to go home/
It’s only the dog and not you that gets a bone/
Soon as you get back to your crib, you phone her like you hadn’t seen her 10 minutes before/
And spend hours more, talking, telling her about how its love/
Don’t you see a pattern? You spend every penny you own on this supposed girl from above/
Cinema, restaurant, and phone calls you pay for/
I’m gonna tell you maybe its time that you look for something more/
You don’t have to listen to the words in this rhyme/
And I will understand if you hate me cause of the opinion of mine/
But I just wants whats best for my brother, so get out of the pool before you go to the deep end/
This bitch has got you wrapped around her little finger/
I couldn’t let my thoughts linger in the air like a bad smell/
Shit can’t you see this bitch is from hell/
Satan’s mother, wife and daughter warped into one/
Sent here to rip your heart into pieces of the sun/
I can see it hurts you so bad when shes not around like a burn/
I suggest you get rid of her today, bother/
Next week she would of moved on to another/
Your drying up, not enough blood for her now/
It’ll be tough but you’ll get over her some how.

hit me back with some replies.

Shit was iight for a first verse. That's a messed up situation though. Good looking out for him.