short
 

how does one get better without feedback? i do not know....constructive critisism is good!....sorry its so short

my lack of words is what pushes me to get better/
and i watch as my vocab grows letter by letter/
a lyrical sweater made of flows that just continue to grow/
like a garden of words, that i continue to sew/
what do you know? i might have found my niche/
found a place to come back to when lifes a bitch/
my hands start to twitch when i have lines to spit/
but all i can do is hope that they hit/
lines that fit, seem to be so rare to me/
but as i get better i find that i can see/
what ill be if i stick to this game/
even if right now i sound pretty lame/

Man, yo shit aint too bad, the wordplay on the lyrical sweater line then back up with the gareden of words sewn together was a fucken nice concept man, I liked that shit, you also got a good rhyme scheme, may be a bit short but its short and sharp which is good, keep it up dawg!

Peace OUt!

thanks dude, its replys like that that keep me trying

damn dawg. Yo im new to this site as a matter of fact i just signed 2day but ni99az be spittin they asses off up here man. That gangsta bra. Keep spittin dawg

it is kinda weak kid...but keep at it....atleast u tryin wit the metas...but explore other aspects of this shit to....and wit ya metas...u got shit swithed up hardly makin sense....switch up

"that i continue to sew" with "that jus continue to grow"....

and them 2 lines will make more sense...if u look at the lines individually they make no sense

you gettin better and better... you spittin what you know... keep at it... drop me a pm with a link to your next post... keep rhymin

the end u stopped trying lol but keep wit the wordplay just add all aspects like wordplay, punchlines, metaphors, similies, imagry, vocab...shit like that, people think all u got to do to be a MC is rhyme and make sence and have a topic, its not like that if u wanna be a true mc, commercial motha fuckas be like that tho...stay spittin

tho it was short it had good word-play an a couple nice mettas, u need constructive feedback? Keep tryin and elevate ure vocab and you'll b droppin bombs in no time.....