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-   -   came up with this real quick (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=34231)

UNFADEABLE 03-17-03 12:32 AM

came up with this real quick
 
this aint my greatest cause of 2 reasons...1) its been a while, 2) tried a new style... but here we go tell me what you think


baby girl, ya body is bangin got me wantin to start slangin
so i could get the dollo and we could start hangin
mami i aint playin, i'll take ya to the finest place to dine
get ya the most expensive treat to eat and lettin ya taste the wine
i want ya face with mine, lip lockin playin tonsel hockey
straight up not even a red light could stop me from bein with you
i aint scared to be seen with you and most def would be caught sleepin with you
see we like ying and yang cause we different but we still the same
i'm real to the game but i'll give it up for a moment with you
but like a compulsive liar its hard to tell ya the truth
honestly i'm intimidated to get intimate
cause sooner or later i'd be playin ya like an instrument
this playa lifestyle is infinite, not even gramatica could kick the habit
i'll pitch this game, try to stay Brave like greg maddux
and stick with ya like i was a drug addict...

Orikle 03-17-03 07:13 AM

Yo man i hear yo message, you started off well but:

"i want ya face with mine, lip lockin playin tonsel hockey
straight up not even a red light could stop me from bein with you
i aint scared to be seen with you and most def would be caught sleepin with you"

With these lines here yo completely lost me, I couldnt see no rhyin or flow at all dogg, it kept on goin that way too, maybe I just don't see it, u might have a way of linkin it up good when yo spit, anyway, I hear what yo sayin but more rhymin and better flow would make it all the better.

Peace Out Yo!!!!

UNFADEABLE 03-17-03 09:59 PM

thanks...good lookin, wouldn't mind more

UNFADEABLE 03-19-03 01:16 AM

anyone else? c'mon ppl


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