Dull Pen
 

a writing of mine turned open mic... eh, i don't know

the notebooks i kept were empty plates|
so i never starved, it was always words i ate|
i drank from the banks of fluid thoughts upon planks|
nailed down with the confidence of having faith|
this dull pen scribbles itself dry again and again|
its dullness, resonates beauty from the bud to stem|
-to the roots both deep and shallow|
till there's the white light killing all the shadows|
and yes, i don't have a life|
i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|
all i care about is death and why the 'alive' dies|
my ancestors were full-blooded, but i feel empty inside|
so my pride consists of ink on a cold night|
-where i confide in a tablet and the glow of a light|
this pen writes and writes and replies my eyes|
-with my sacrifice and i-i love it|
the cruel, the few, the school, no one understands|
they probably do, but for me to find out isn't the plan|
i'd rather command words to slabs of wood|
-and cram books that could change my act|
-my pacification of bland and to the no answers when asked|
i'm past passin' shy to my class, i should-i'm going to make an impact|
"remember that quiet guy? that always sat in the back?"|

... and yeah.. that's as far as i got... i'll finish it later but not edit it in... its not meant for that... peace

"i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|
all i care about is death and why the 'alive' dies|"

that is some deep shit
I really liked it

damm, how come no one replying to this? maybe cause they don't get it.... actually I didn't fully understand it, just a few parts, everything else I got... complex no doubt
yo was feeling the flow in this, shit had rhythm to me... nice vocab and wordplay yo...

-1-

Yo, good drop, I hear what Alias is sayin, most cats probabaly don't get it, some pieces i had to read twice but yeh shit was deep, only advice I could give yo is to have a fully consistent rhyme scheme then it will flow to the full!

Peace Out Yo!!!!

damn mofo this shit was ill. newbies take note. this was solid, iron man from top to bottom. had everything, truely likin this.

stay up!!!

too deep to try and decipher at the moment... might come back when i feel 'at peace with the birds and nature etc etc'.... good drop... nice everything... keep rhymin

and yes, i don't have a life|
i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|

dude i agree with 12cent,
awesome rhyme bro

Man this was dope....Tha rhyme fell off a little at sum parts....But tha concept held it up....Tha deepness was dope....

and yes, i don't have a life|
i'm a self-proclaimed outcast-with a pen and pad that writes|

I thought that was the best line in tha piece....Keep writin' man...Peace

"this dull pen scribbles itself dry again and again|
its dullness, resonates beauty from the bud to stem|"

yea, this shit was straight.. deep doesn't even describe shit in this rhyme.... there seems to be some hidden inner meanings that I found, read over this like six times and still don't fully get the whole thing.. but yo, It's good..

This Was Nice Kidd .

Flow All That Was On Point

I Liked The Opening, Dope .

Dope Peice Fellow.

*cough* :D

hahahahaha, respect D

*cough*