Oh My God Click On This And Read
 

IM YOUNG GADGET
I WALK THE STREETS WITH THE LOADED RACKET
I COCK BACK IT
THEN AIM IT AT A PUNK FAGGOT
I POP MAGGOTS
PUT THEM IN THE TRUNK THEN LATCH IT
WITH DIFFERENT TOOLS LIKE INSPECTER GADGET
I CLICK CLACK THEN GET BACK WITH METAL ATTACHMENTS
CRUMBLE NIGGAS LIKE CRACKERS
HANG WITH GAUT GRABBERS BACK SLAPPERS
I LEAVE NIGGAS HURT IN THE DIRT WHILE IM GOING TO WORK ON THAT BODY UNDER YOUR SHIRT
IM THE INSPECTER
EAT YOU ALIVE LIKE HANNIBAL LECTOR
CRACK YOUR HEAD OPEN TILL I CAN TASTE YOUR NECTER
HIT YOU LIKE A HAMMER FROM BLACK AND DECKER
ILL DECK YA WRECK YA PUT YOU ON THE STRECTHA BET YA THE BULLETS CATCH YA PUT YOU ON THE STRECTHA



yall tell me how that sound I need some help. I can write verses all day but I cant come up with a hook. also keep in mind Im only 14 years old so be kind of cool



GHETTO ANIMOSITY

dude it wasent wack


but shit dawg, ur a bull shitter, if u got studip time, y u doin text dawg? shouldent u have a soundclick or sumthin, or r u lying,

as for the ryhmes they were ok, just not my style

Straight up dawg it wasn't inspiriring and if you got time in tha studio and thats all you got to put down its not worth it any way. And if you can write verses but not hooks look through your books and sometimes you can make a hook out of a part of a verse just take the dopest part of the verse it usally works if i cant think of one.

keep going and you'll keep getting better and your only 14 so yous got plenty of time man.

u want feed back tho?

change to first gadget to cadet

cuz thats how i read it on accident then looked over it again and it sounds better

IM a YOUNG cadet
I WALK on the set WITH THE LOADED RACKET
i got skills where you lacken [or lack it]
THEN AIM IT AT A FAGGOT
I POP MAGGOTS and drag shit
PUT THEM IN THE TRUNK and THEN LATCH IT
WITH DIFFERENT TOOLS LIKE INSPECTER GADGET
I CLICK CLACK it THEN GET BACK WITH METAL ATTACHMENTS [thumbs up]
CRUMBLE NIGGAS gotta back bone? ill crack it
HANG WITH GAUT GRABBERS BACK SLAPPERS -[doesnt make sense]
I LEAVE NIGGAS HURT IN THE DIRT this aint gunna work
IM THE INSPECTER
EAT YOU ALIVE LIKE HANNIBAL LECTOR
CRACK YOUR HEAD OPEN put u thru a shreddar
HIT YOU LIKE A HAMMER FROM BLACK AND DECKER
ILL DECK YA WRECK YA -deleted-BET YA THE BULLETS CATCH YA PUT YOU ON THE STRECTHA
but when ur absent i wont forget ya

there ya go, revised and better than ever

don't take it personal but those other cats just don't want any beef that shit needs some true help that was mad simple dude "i crumble niggas like crackers" c'mon man don't get big headed and shit if tryin to proove that you hard some shit through your lyrics think of one bad ass bar to put done and leave it don't go on about some movie type bull shit that fuckn hannibal shit died when the movie came out on tape look don't get me wrong you aint garbage but this wasn't shit

odd gives it
2 of 5 mics

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww CAPS

Note: Refrain From Using Caps Please

thats pretty good seen as your only 14. I felt it.
keep workin though. you'll do well.
I voted on your poll.

Fiori

THANKS FOR THE OPINIONS,BUT IM NOT GOING TO CHANGE ME STYLE OF RAP SCAREFACE KAPONE BUT THANKS FOR THE ADVICE YALL. PLUS THE REASON WHY IM NOT IN THE STUDIO IS TO BE TRUTHFUL IM KIND OF NERVOUS. BUT IM GOING TO KEEP WRITING TILL I GET ABOUT 120 RAPS IN MY BOOK. SO FAR I GOT LIKE 65 OR 66.THANKS AGAIN

GHETTO ANIMOSITY