This is a slightly revised version of my first attempt at hip hop
 

What up dawg you can call me MC-B.//
All my life, my brain's just been a mystery.//
I ain't got no goals or aspirations.//
I get fucked up, talking to apparitions.//
Yeah, I'm a skater, bitch so what?//
You mess with me I'll fuck you up or have you shot.//
You know, fuck it. Your life ain't worth doing time.//
I'll fuck your rep up man, then you'll be fuckin mine.//
I'll fuckin own you from your toes right up to your head,//
From right now until the moment that you're fucking dead.//
i may be a white guy but I got my boys.//
They stand behind me for the bad times and the joys.//
My boy ---- rhymes, he's fuckin wicked yo.//
I heard his and thought, hmmm, I'll give it a go.//
If I succeed or bomb, I don't really care.//
I'm just trying to express what's all up in here.//
I'm jst trying to fit my mind onto a page,//
Happiness, Depression, MURDEROUS RAGE!//
There's very little in this life that really gets me down.//
Always remember to keep smiling, no time for frowns.//
It takes 43 muscles to make a frown.//
It only takes 17 to turn it upside down.//
I alwasy wish I could have lived through the hippie times.//
I'd be toking lots of reefer and busting groovy rhymes.//
All in all I am happy with what I got.//
It doesn't matter if it's nothing or a lot.
I'm just waiting for the day I'm gonna die.//
Until that day, from my mouth will come no lies.//
I always like to tell it straight up, as it is.//
Hopefully that will get me going in this bis.//

this shit is good man..... but this got me laughin my ass off

It takes 43 muscles to make a frown.//
It only takes 17 to turn it upside down.//

like i said its an ill rhyme.. so keep it up.

Thanks bro.

"It takes 43 muscles to make a frown.//
It only takes 17 to turn it upside down.//"
dope bit, but u gotta make yo lines longer and use some better vocabulary then yo shit will be betta.keep elivatin

trust bro.. you elevated since tha last one.. "use better vocab"^ like trill says, not bigger words, but better words.. some of it seemed kinda.. umm, I don't know.. "silly".. all in all I liked it tho.. stay up yo.. we doin' acid this weekend? or did matt even talk to the guy... why we leave shit like that up to him I'll never know...

not bad man...im an amateur so i don't know how to rate shit like that....it's good though....peace!

uppin for replies