Goodbye World – Forever More
 

Goodbye World – Forever More

Stone walled
Ashen faced
Grave heart
Fallen faith
Mixed emotions-
Devastation
Revenge consumed-
Abhoration
Merciless heart
Evil heathen
Once vibrant
Thus befallen
Loves pariah
Forgotten promises
Broken dreams-
All putrefied
Exhausted will
Self-suicide
Baby boom-
Reproduction
Lonely world-
Segregation
Faint of heart
Bitter weep
Final step
Forever sleep
Welcome death-
Suffocation
Last stop
Eternal damnation

This one had some really short lines. It was still very descriptive like the other one I read from you. Although I didn't really pick up on whats going on in it. All I got from it was a lot of pain. Looks like things went from bad to worse to death. I probably missed the meaning of it like I do a lot of poems, but what I did pick up I liked.

"Lonely world-
Segregation
Faint of heart
Bitter weep
Final step
Forever sleep
Welcome death-
Suffocation
Last stop
Eternal damnation"

That was the part that I liked the most out of it all. Good post from you.

Thanks again lol
Yeah, im still experimenting with this style of writing... both of the pieces ive posted arent like my usual work, and ive never posted on a site before.. thats why i am now, to get some non biased opinions of the styles ive been attempting lately...
and you were spot on with the interpretation.. :)
link me to some of yours ok?

this was real good. linez were really short, but it still was deep. tha kinda poetry that makes u think. interestin style, not ur average poem. i liked it, great piece.

Ooh. Interesting. Propz to you for experimenting and goin out on a limb with this style. I was feelin it. Sometimes you dont need a lot of words to say what needs to be said. I liked it. Especially the ending. Nice writin. Stay up with this n keep droppin. Pz.