Dillusioned
 

im trapped in my world of addicts and habits...oddballs infatuated w/ magic//
accidents are tragic...od is tha way to go plus tha snow i gotta have it//

i cant mask it, or even try and conceal it...this is tha real shit...
someone sheisted me i reveal tha real clips, and kill bitch//

although im not much for violence...i speak in whispers so i translate in silence//

cant contmeplate therefor i cant concentrate...and i cant stop tha shake//

ill never be tha same...so i ask of you to free my name, cause i cant see tha same, usin me to blame//

in this constant fight with tha demons...tha drugs make me feel that im dreamin...and inside i stay screamin.. my mind and soul need some cleanin, but i just cant stop fiendin//

now im lost and cant be discovered...cocaine and jane keeps my lungs smothered, like a black blanket that covered...how can i restrain when i was taught stuff and brought up by an addicted mother...even through drugs i lost a lover.

this is really short...you should lengthen it up, maybe make a whole song of it. It had a good concept, and I enjoyed the metaphors and vocab. good title...fuck, wicked title.
best fucking line I've heard in a long time:

although im not much for violence...i speak in whispers so i translate in silence//

sweet lord thats awesome
check out my stigmata piece
One

thanks for the replies uppin ^^^^^^^

That was pretty tight, and I agree, maybe you should add to it. It sounds good, and flows smooth. Keep it up.

wow great, i am just randmoly posting, but i really like your flow dog check out theUnreal_1 his rhymes are dope.!

uppin^^^^^ for more replies come on peeps quit sleepin

aint sleepin tht was dope too short for something like tht, good vocab and metaphors too
return the favor
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=51173

yo....good word play......props for (although im not much for violence...i speak in whispers so i translate in silence//).....nice

that was straight but try speaking on somethin more topical.

well since you dont know what tha topic is obviously its my conflicts wit drugs and what ive lost due to them,in a shortened version and i will make a second part to this yall be on tha look out in the mean time peep my new post tell me what yall thinkits called Devious Things.hit me back

just uppin this to remind yall that there will be a second version of this soon,be on tha look out,peace.

This was a good piece.....I like the analogies and flowin here....
Topic was kind tight as well
i give it 9.5/10...

please hit up this battle with a POLL vote..
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=69141

yo i agree i think though that it wasn't to short you just stopped short but it was definently dope. I think it flowed really nice and you didn't fall into that trap of overwording it real. But yo do you really believe that shit?

i believed it when i was struggling to stop doin drugs,but rehab eventualy cleaned me up ya dig,i still smoke L's and shit but ya know gotta maintaine,uppin