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-   Poetic Scriptures (http://community.rapverse.com/forumdisplay.php?f=9)
-   -   Frozen In Time (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=51845)

Van Ished 05-30-03 01:16 AM

Frozen In Time
 
paused, not moving, I remain constant in my frame,
my eyes roam sparatically grasping hints of my surroundings,
to the left, two armed men, wearing all black,
a bookshelf only no books, it's stacked full of dust,
in front, a pistol, chrome plated, cold on my forehead,
the holder, the man who I flicked off the other day,
behind him, my loved one, screamin at voice's apex,
behind her a clock, with-which I try to focus my thoughts,
to the right, and also behind, cinder-blocked walls,
cold from death and orange stained from past events,
slowly as I watch the hand climb back up towards the twelve,
the chamber turns, all other noise stops, and last I heard... a bang,
the fraction of a second I lived, as the rest of me died,
I fell to to the floor, I died frozen in time.

blah, I don't like it.....opinions?

The Necromancer 05-31-03 03:19 AM

It was still nice. Great description of what was going on. Reminds me of when I'm playing a video game and I have to get up and go somewhere and I pause the game only to find I didn't push the pause button hard enough and I end up dying.

~Shalom~

Coast 05-31-03 03:35 AM

there is a fuckin poetry section in rapbattles?!

Noiz 05-31-03 08:03 AM

Lol...Lmao Thats Pretty Funny "Theres a fuckin poetry secton on rap battles????"

It Was Good Though...I Understand What Your Trying To Get Across


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