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-   -   Dreams (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=59878)

MeX 06-22-03 12:58 AM

Dreams
 
aiight i havent posted in a while so i quickly created this.

How many people like me do ya see/|
White and busting their rap on mtv?|
craving fame but none know their name/
being put down they smuggle their shame/
as the spit in the underground
Waiting to be found/ becoming a hound/
as they put forth everything they've got/
put on the spot but there everything their not/
expected to be and their dreams break free
but they go home shattered /
Their dreams have been splattered/
On the pavement of hope/
So they turn to dope hoping to scope/
Out their problems with coke/
Till the OD on a drug called codeine/
And end up dead cremated instead/
And their remains scattered just like their dreams that were shattered.
Uppin for feedback and please just dont diss it. Give some advice

Reno Starr 06-22-03 01:01 AM

It had an aight flow the content of it was decent. Some things really didnt rhyme exmaple:

Out their problems with coke/
Till the OD on a drug called codeine/
And end up dead cremated instead/

But ya getting there with ya works, you slowly grow some.

Dark Lord Nykon 06-22-03 01:02 AM

Had some god stuff
in it but it ended weak
You need to work at it

InFaMoUs KnIGhT 06-22-03 01:18 AM

FUCKIN MEX GET AT OUR BATTLE U STILL HAVENT POSTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!

InFaMoUs KnIGhT 06-22-03 01:20 AM

O SHIT!
dark lord
i got mad props fo u ive seen yea shit u mad good

5harp5h00ter 06-22-03 01:43 AM

most of your verse was nice, but R.x was right about the stuff that didnt really rhyme, the rest was nice though

peace~~~

MeX 06-22-03 02:38 AM

^^^ thanks ill make sure to watch that in the future. Uppin. Got 19 views 5 replys. Yall are sleeping


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