...:::What Do You See:::...
 

Now crime revolves around me...

can't understand why my pain is suffer, i'm not to blame your brother//
i've been around this whole world since my adolecense//
holding for protection plus caressing on my smith and wesson//
so i'm real, blood shedded tears cuz i can't breathe next to the ones
that bled essence against my misery//
so i walk on waters hoping to never drown//
i was blessed with a ghost so i'm dead around//
now i'm asked these questions on why i'm hesitant and why a menace throws lead around acting negligent//
its that his life is never felt, indices himself to have a negative response so it's never dealt//
so now a coffiin turns into the home an exit for the mess he was involved in//
manifest the problem to solve it without fallin imma live to survive that's a promise//


I'm Ghost...

hmm...alright...this not bad at all...more like a freestyle to me...

i noticed that the line breaks didnt really fit the flow...maybe some lines were long and others were short

but..the content is pretty simple and interesting...

ur emotions are pretty well expressed...

not really tooo much to it...but nice drop tho!

Though i felt it's a bit loosely done at times...

...it still had a certain amount of depth to it. I actually 'feel' what you're saying in my own way. The more 'intelligent' and 'reality wise' survivor if you would...

..resp...

...
 

THE WORDZ WERE GOOD ONLY THE FLOW DIDN"T REALLY MAKE SENSE....................
[B][i] M.A.W. ..."I eat rappers fo' breakfast and gangstas at night"...

I see a good poem there

Nice pice with a good message, but some of the lines seemed to long, it might have worked better to split some of them up, same thing as shiznit, seemed more like a freestyle, keep it up though
peace