Oh What Fun
 

who dares to come forth and mock-the-not-mockable//
cuz wen its time to drop hot nines i know im unstopable//
its unprobable that most yall can hustle and stay free//
believe me intelligence is somethin you must have see//
my rhymes do what guns do they cannonade-and-murder//
i digest yall like lemon cake,ya scream-nobody-hears-ya//
nobody feels ya,im a psycho,my parents say im fearles//
my rhymins like gillete,im mach3 and leave yall hairless//
a close shave,i saved ya,im not pleased at how ya behaved//
ya treat ya wifey like the ignorant did way bak with all the slaves//
i wave goodbye to your future,i jus took it like your life//
its funny how i fucked you up jus like i fucked your wife//
shoot rhymes like rifles,im happy cuz'just turned ya ass into a shook one//
i took a gun and had some fun wen i told this crack head he better run//
big pun made an example,so all the fat kids started dieting//
they hit on slimfast like the cops hit in L.A wen they started rioting//
battering ya heads,stuff batterys up ya ass holes thats all-so-tight//
click one of ya fingaz and face ya forwards,your now one of my bedroom lights//
this jus might be one of the wackest,but dont judge harshly,im jus havin fun//
cuz wen i started to write this shit out it wasnt intent to try and stun....

peace

Dope.

very nice....

any more..?!!

yo...any more feed back peoples...??

ill return tha favour/...!!

yo...come on bruddas....let a person know what u feelin bout his drop..??

Yo man is this was a Free then it was str8 fire....... if it was written then u need a lil help.. BUT ONLY A LIL (and im only helpin u cos u from UK like me)...
eg
"my rhymins like gillete,im mach3 and leave yall hairless//"

this was kinda corny and pointless.. but it had a good idea to it.. so you cudda said something like this

Im like gillete, when we face to face... il leave your wig split and hairless//

Its got exactly the same idea but makes a lil more sense u feel? but the free/written/song whuteva! was still good.. props 4 UK emcees

could u return the favour and hit this up

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=63749

soldier said basically everything
this was a pretty good drop and all but some of the idead in the punches were overshadowed by the corniness. Im not tryin to beef, you just need to work on the punchlines more.
peep my piece called 110% Raw Remix feat. Rythmic Tendicies

yo....any more helpfull feedback.....?