"Your Fault"
 

ay yo..I'm back! lol...Check this out and tell me what yah think...Thankz...

You know I tried to make us work it out
But you were against it, Always in doubt
You constantly pushed me aside
Not hurting me physically, but emotionally inside
All thoughs midnight late talks
Remembering those romantic evening walks
Our love was once great and strong
But in the end you done me wrong
You wonder now Why I left you
Tell me, what else could I do?
Why couldn't you open your eyes and see?
That I wasn't going to let you lie to me
I couldn't take the pain any longer
My hate inside was growing stronger
I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life
I dreamed of me being your wife
But you turned your back on me and made me furious
Telling all your friends I seem delirious
I was tired of being played
Left at home and feeling betrayed
My love for you turned Cold
My future ahead seemed bold
I just had to leave you behind
Force you to the back of my mind
Take off, and leave you in my past
For I knew We wouldn't last.
So now think of what this lesson has taught
It's letting you know, Losing me was Your Fault...

Thanks..any info will be appreciated...

But you turned your back on me and made me furious
Telling all your friends I seem delirious

dosent rhyme..delerious not delorrreus

very simple rhyme scheme through n through it
and left a lot more to be desired

^^^It's pronounced delirious, content. So in a way, it does rhyme.

The piece was simple and had a pure truth to it. Though i felt some of the emotions were a bit blunted and you were stuck between a rawness and a thought out construction.

..still, fairly nice..

..resp...

^^either way...
delirious dont rhyme with furious just because they have ious
but maybe you werent trying to rhyme with that though

other than that its not bad but rather simple

Not in the classical sense, no. But in a more poetic and obscure way...

Gah, it doesn't matter. Don't wanna clog the thread. And i do think she was trying to rhyme the two in the classical sense. So your point still stands content.

Thanks Varentao...I know this one was kinda simple...and ill work on the next one...I understand where you was coming from Content...But then again when you pronounce it it does ryhme...Thanks for the feedback anyway...

peAce