RapVerse.com Community

RapVerse.com Community (http://community.rapverse.com/index.php)
-   Poetic Scriptures (http://community.rapverse.com/forumdisplay.php?f=9)
-   -   Last Kiss (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=65780)

Twiztid_chick69 07-14-03 11:13 PM

Last Kiss
 
This is a rather short poem..its one of my first ever written...tell me what you think please...

I take your gantle, warm hand in mine
And know it will only be a matter of time
You pull me up to you, So very close
I knew that your the one I wanted most
You wrapped your arms around my waist
I couldn't wait for that one, delicate taste
I put one hand on the side of your handsome face
You let me know I could never be replaced
I knew you were gonna kiss me, I wanted you to
All I wanted at that passionate moment, Was you
I closed my gray-eyes, and licked my warm lips
You slid you hands down, onto my hips
We placed our bodies against one another
You became so close to me, I thought I would smother
Then, suddenly you let out a nasty, Evil hiss
I screamed and knew this would be my first and...Last Kiss

Born To Kill 07-15-03 01:54 PM

Damn, dear...

What the hell was all that about?

Pretty deep...

Ya threw relatively simple, but it came to impact.

I like.

Da NFamous 07-15-03 05:38 PM

umm i dont like the last two lines at first it seemed like another of those boring teeny bopper corney love poems that is only cute to the bf and gf but i kinda like that the last two lines twisted that and brought the poem to something more deep but im not sure i fully feel the poem overall stay up, 1luv.

Twiztid_chick69 07-15-03 06:38 PM

Yes it was simple...I wrote it when I was 12 or 13...But thanks for the responses...

peAce

Crysis 07-15-03 06:53 PM

TIGHT you like twiztis? hell yea didnt think id find any chicks on here who like shit like that...over all the poem was tight twist at tthe end made it better keep up the good work

hostilespitter 07-15-03 06:54 PM

this is a good spit filled wit emotion

Twiztid_chick69 07-16-03 11:37 PM

Yeah, Crysis, I like twiztid shit...Gives me a good adrenaline rush...lol...Thanks for the feedback boo...Thank you hostilespitter...I will try and keep up :)

peAce


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:27 AM.