im going
 

Realistically I know im not going 2 die instantly/
I understand depression will sadistically/
Dissect me clinically over many years 2specifically/
Torture me and so this knife I hold does symbolise/
The end 2all my cries and now I realise/
Love nor money will conquer me and so/
Ive decided its time 4 me 2 go allow my sprit 2 flow/
Before it 2 is corrupt but by meeting the end/
My very soul may indeed descend/
In2 hell but oh well I couldn’t complain/
Id rather go there than continue 2 feel this pain/

not bad

Varentao: If i see any more from you. You will most probably be banned.

i really dig this shit man it had good vocab in the beggining but it was a little too simple to have the vocab i dont know it was good though dont get me wrong its just that in the slightest way it seemed off balance but u mos def get respect, also can u check out my poem it means a lot to me, 1luv.

A well enough compressed piece of emotions. Blunt with an overall simplicity.

Rhyme scene a bit rigid, but then i felt that was one of the things that made the piece what it was.

Er, very good for what it was.

I actually remember you from way back i think. Your name thingy looks familiar.

..resp...

I thought it was pretty good...

peAce

yeah from what i can remember i was here b4 u

hmmm...interesting but the fact that there aint too much in it made the whole piece sort of hanging on a thread. Its like lacking something that i mostly look for in writing but for some reason i cant tell you what it is because i know u have it inside and u just gotta familiarize with it and use it.

This is not bad at all. The simplicity made this piece understandable. keep it up!

You probably were. Once again, nice enough piece.

HEY!!!!! its my guy!!!! HEY i'm mad at you, why don't you "im" me anymore?!?!? I should beat you up so bad!!!! Hmm..I guess i'll let you get by this just one time. I liked this piece because it displayed your emotions....but i'm upset that your still feeling this way...hmm....i wont make you sleep on the couch anymore..if that helps..(if you even remember that joke..lol)
Kid you know I love you....Just email me if you need somethign
Babyblues20042002@yahoo.com

Glad to see your backk...I MISSED YOU!!

nice drop but it needed more complexity it was missin sometin the vocab n stucture was ther but it jus neede more in it