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-   -   Collab- Fgee & Rythmic "Death" (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=68163)

fgee 07-24-03 06:33 PM

Collab- Fgee & Rythmic "Death"
 
(rythmictendencies)
I Had A Dream, Where Darkened Death, Ruled Supreme...
My Visions Stretched To The Extreme, To Hypnotised To Scream...
Through The Gates, Death Murkily Gleamed, In My Sensitive Eyes...
To Kill, Cheat n’ Lie He Advised, His Grimly Smile, Was A Eccentric Disguise...
I Could Hear, Painful Chilling Cries, From Souls, Who’d said There Last Goodbyes...
I listened To His Words Wise, Dead Lost Souls, Slowly Began To Rise...
He Filled My Brain With Evident Lies, He Told Me, Death Is a Guarantee...
I Was In No Position To Disagree, Die A Forgotten Mc, He Hatefully Told Me...
He Explained These Sins Three, Murder, Theft n’ Reppin’ The B.R.E....
I Made A Plea, Got Down On Both Knees, And Ask Him To Excuse Me...
He Hit me With Verbal n’ Mental Debris, Told Me “Usted Reep lo que Usted Siembra”...
His Escalating Intelligent Words, Sounded “Blah, Blah, Blah” To Me...
He Wanted To Know, Which Path I’d Choose, He Made me Offers I Could Never Sanely Refuse...
He Made Me Unwillingly Agree To His Satanist Views, Suffered Vocal Abuse...
Death Came In Thousands Not Twos, He Asked Me To Step in His Untouched Shoes...
I Felt Excruciating Fiery Pain, Earth Is Evil’s Domain, 1000 Year Never-ending Reign...
He Explained, He Inflicts Heartache To Entertain, Even Through The Day Of Judgement He’ll Remain...

Freed from life it released my soul
Companions to death my fates unrolled
Separated from life by coursing veins
Amongst fellow beings to share the pain

(fgee)
Consciousness ceased I was immortalised in this dream
Reality evolved and soon the nightmare came clean
Duped by the dark escapology imposible till light
A post mortem of humanity I stared at the after life
A world of gruesome figures blood was the carpet
Haunting souls and their frames completely parted
Skeletal frames with infinite stares carve a meager existence
I breathe lungfulls of life for the ones who didn’t make the distance
Perfect bodies compliment the butchered horror stories
With each stride fetal abortions and all gory matter ignore me
Helpless limbs reach without hope for the holy grail
But futility governs all creations they're doomed to fail
The arms of destiny cradles and encaptures their essence
Here they reside failures of life learning their lesson
Question their actions and regret reaches out to repent
Trapped in a spiral of tormented land all heart is spent
Vacant hollows of echoes mouth a thousand screams
Lifes last precious seconds constantly remind of scenes
I wake from slumber but ghostly faces stain my vision
Death from natural causes I had become the latest edition

Freed from life it released my soul
Companions to death my fates unrolled
Separated from life by coursing veins
Amongst fellow beings to share the pain

PleDge 07-24-03 06:53 PM

all i can say......wow.....this drop was..wow lol i really really really loved it..shit man i never knew u had it inu 9.5...i would give u ten but the hook was pretty lame cmpared to the rest

Dez 07-24-03 07:27 PM

word Pledge. both of you came real nice and both stayed with the topic. flow was gravy on both sides as well as vocabulary. i dont see anything wrong with this piece...

8.5/10

RythmicTendicies 07-25-03 06:19 AM

thanx, uppin'

WORD~PERFECT 07-25-03 09:10 AM

I AGREE RHYTHMIC USED AN ARY OF WORDPLAY THAT ADDEDD GRAPHICS TO THIS RHYME WHILE FGEE USED PROPER WORDUSAGE TO ONLY INTESIFY AND DEPICT THE MEANING.YOU ALASO CAPTURED THE REALITH OF FICTION WITH IN A DREAM ITSELF-SUCH A VOCAB SPANNED BY NOTH CAN ONLY MAKE THIS A PEACE TO BOAST.I HOPE TO SEE MORE FROM YOU AS A TEAM.10/10 WOW THAT ONLY THE SECOND TIME I DO THAT AND BOTH WERE DONE TODAY IM AMAZE3D

fgee 07-25-03 02:19 PM

up

fgee 07-25-03 07:41 PM

god dam....

{UneeK} 07-25-03 07:51 PM

damn, any more said and i will spoil the moment

fgee 07-26-03 08:31 AM

great feedback^ i learnt alot from it

RythmicTendicies 07-26-03 08:55 AM

^lol, Freepost Garfix!^

Up For Some Constructive Critisism, I Give Y'all Lengthy Feedback, return The Favour!

RythmicTendicies 07-27-03 07:02 AM

uppin'

Accelerate 07-27-03 01:10 PM

Just to say, nothing is wrong about this piece.
Rythmic and Fgee, ya both had a crazy flow to it, Word-Perfect said everything i was about to say,(dammit).Rythmic had a great introduction to this whole situation, and just added on with his great wordplay. Fgee thenn added a whole new dimension and everything was put together very nicely. Ya should do more collabo's. 9.5/10

fgee 07-27-03 07:08 PM

thanks for F/b


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