Need you (not a love poem...)
 

"Brittany, turn that crap down!"
"Hey, do you wanna drive?"
"It'll heal before you're married"
Daddy, I really need you around
To help me persue a normal life
'Cause this pain is a lot to carry

10:30 trips for jamocha shakes
Taco bell chicken soft shell tacos
& my "'til the street lights" curfew
Do you know how much holdin' tears takes?
Where, when, & why'd you have to go?
Bottom line is I still need you

Your little "Booger's" all grown up
No longer your princess in training
I come with all new boo- boos to kiss
'Cause I've graduated from my penguin cup
Still it always seems like it's raining
I'll always need you, I have to deal with miss

A very personal piece. Maybe too personal to critique.

So instead i'll say that you put a lot of emotins into this piece. Ones that may not be easy to understand straight away. Due to how they're covered over by real personal references. But once one digs, you get a real feel to it (not that oyu don't when you don't, but when you dig into it a bit, you get an even 'better' one..).

The honesty of this piece was what struck most though. The personal honesty of it. Hidden (maybe unintentionally) by personal references.

..resp...

It wasn't intentional covering up, but I can imagin how that may have covered it up as well, an my daddy didn't run out on me, stuff happened but it's a long story I didn't want anyone to think that tho.. thanks bud, peace

this piece was clean, quite emotional,my dad ran out on me but its worse when youve had time to grow a strong emotional bond between you and him.keep spittin.peace out boo.