Untitled (luckiest two)
 

Two Souls bound together with eternal love so great and true
Two individuals, two different thoughts, two different feelings
As time passes on, year after year these individuals form into one
One heart, one mind, One spirit thinking together
Knowing each other inside and out,
Excepting all of the other person’s flaws, and loving everyone
Being honest with each other, never holding anything back
Giving up everything in their life to make that one person happy
These Two souls are bound together in an unbreakable bond
Love not found by everyone, you can reach for the stars
Never to find what these two souls share so deep and true
I would give my life for what you have, give my soul to share
The same feelings as the luckiest two people on earth



***kind of a first draft, I know the structure is off but hey it is not fully done...I just wanted to get some feed back on it...Before I continue writing on this...***

Though you approached the cliches with a certain amount of dexterity. I felt the at times bluntness, along with emotions that felt cold, made it hard to get into. Or hard to relate to the extent of which one would want to relate (minimum).

You seemed stuck between emotions and well thought out analysis. Not combining the two together well. And neither going with either side.

Still, i can see it bursting to get out. Just need to find that 'key'.

...resp...

What can I say...? It is love.

And I'd rather not get into a long and extensive critical post, because it is love you wrote about and you wrote it with such conventional beauty.

~Islam~